Friday, September 16, 2016

I Will Fight For You...Anything I Do...I Do It For You


Dennis the Menace



Gah.

Mother Goose and Grimm
Woodpeckers have evolved over millions of years so that their brain is attached to their skull in kind of a mesh system. The skull also has shock absorbers to further protect the woodpecker's brain along with its eyes. Basically, the woodpecker is immune to severe brain damage due to wood pecking (or exhaust pipe pecking as a woodpecker used to do at our old house) and, I would assume, a headache as well. What I'm trying to say is that I don't know what kind of bird Woody was fucking but it certainly wasn't a woodpecker.

Mary Worth
"*SOB* It all started when I tried to lift that box for you and I hurt my back. The vicodin really helped so I wanted mo-o-ore. Then, when I was laying around shirtless all week, I posted a picture to my Instagram and asked people if I was ripped and then people started calling me a 'douchtard' and said that I wasn't ripped and they made fun of my hair and said I was stupid so then I wanted more vicodin to take that pain away too. *SOB*"

Crankshaft
JESUS CHRIST MAKE IT STOP FOR THE LOVE OF GOD MAKE IT STOP

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