Monday, January 30, 2012

Bill Wallace 1947-2012

Bill Wallace, one of my favorite children's authors who wrote Beauty, A Dog Called Kitty, Snot Stew, Totally Disgusting and Coyote Autumn, has passed away. He was one of the many authors who inspired me to be a writer and really got me into reading. He will be remembered.

You can view more of his books, along with his wife's, on their website.

He's Also Drunk

How many of you like the TV series Arrested Development? Then you should read part one of my story "Suicidal Tendencies" over at Liberty. I tried to write it in the same documentary style and the same type of humor. "Suicidal Tendencies" is the story of Daniel Judge who is tasked with having to bring his family back together when his grandmother reveals she's going to commit suicide. It may sound kind of dark and depressing but I promise you, it's not.

Like I do with most of my stories, I wrote "Suicidal Tendencies" out by hand in a notebook but for some reason, most of the first chapter went missing so the, if I may say so, really good funeral scene was gone but I had it typed out and saved so I wasn't too worried. But then, the flash drive I used to save my stories went all...stupid erasing everything I had saved on it. I attempted to retype it but just couldn't get the funeral scene the way I wanted it so I put it away and moved onto something else. But then, I began going through some of my other drives and disks and, on a mini SanDisk I used for a phone I stopped using about four years ago, I found a saved copy of "Suicidal Tendencies."

I originally didn't want to post "Suicidal Tendencies" this soon, I wanted to promote it before publishing it but my lack of writing caused things to change for Liberty #31 and 32. So go check it out. I hope you like it.

To be fair, Brutus stopped working years ago so Veeblefester really shouldn't be surprised.

Sunday, January 29, 2012

No. 31: Suicidal Tendencies, Part 1

One.
A handsome young man walked briskly through the hallways of the office building he worked at. He was wearing a nice dark gray suit along with a purple tie. He was carrying a blue three-ring notebook and a leather satchel. He smiled and acknowledged everyone he passed. This is Daniel Judge and right now, he is happy.

He entered his office and went behind his desk, placing the notebook and satchel on top. He sat down in his chair and prepared to pick up the receiver of his phone. “There you are Mr. Judge. Good morning,” said a short, cute brunette who just appeared in the doorway.

“Good morning Ann,” Daniel said, smiling. “I was just about to call you. Is everything set up for lunch?”

“You bet. Everybody R.S.V.P.’d and I called the International House of Waffles so they would be prepared. I-HOW is a go.” This is Ann Harper. She is Daniel’s assistant. She would do anything for Daniel and even threatened a coffee barista when Daniel’s coffee was iced and he wanted it hot. The barista’s whereabouts are still unknown.

“I can’t believe this day has finally come, Ann. I’ve looked forward to it for literally years,” Daniel smiled.

“I didn’t think you could pull it off,” she replied.

“Oh, ye Gods!” shouted a man from outside Daniel’s office. A man came in and threw his hands up in a flamboyant gesture. “Daniel, I have tried I give up.” This is Rod Kueffer, Daniel’s friend and administrative assistant to the human resources department. “I’ve worked with drag queens that have more class than our human resources department,” Rod continued.

“What happened now?” Daniel asked.

“I brought Sascha her morning coffee from The Java Bean like I do every morning since it’s on my way to work and what does do? She takes it then cocks her head to one side, smiles and says ‘thanks.’” For years, Rod had brought the HR manager, Sascha Hewitt, a coffee from an exclusive coffee shop. Sascha would then cock her head to one side, smile and say thanks.

“Isn’t that what she does every morning?” Daniel asked.

“But this time she cocked her head to the left. She usually cocks it to the right,” Rod explained.

Daniel stared at Rod then slowly turned his head toward Ann. “Is the conference room ready for my nine o’clock meeting?”

“Yep, all ready.”

“Great. I’ll see you at lunch Rod. Oh, and just remember that I don’t want Lindsay to know about my family. She thinks most of them are all dead and that is perfectly fine with me,” Daniel said as he, Rod and Ann left his office.

“You really like Lindsay don’t you Daniel?” Ann asked.

Daniel loved Lindsay. However, Daniel’s normal conversation with Lindsay usually ended up embarrassing himself and it had been like that since they met years ago at a gym. Daniel was on a stationary bike and Lindsay was one bike over. Daniel was focused on the nearby TV and chewing gum. Both are oblivious to each other. After pedaling awhile, they finally made eye contact and smiled at each other.

“I’ll race you to the top of the hill,” Lindsay said playfully.

Daniel started to say something but swallowed his gum and began choking until dislodging it and spitting it out onto the floor.

Since then, Daniel has been afraid of expressing his feelings toward Lindsay.

“No. No, no, no-no-no, no. No. We’re just friends and I’m okay with that,” Daniel tried to convince. Ann and Rod looked at each other and rolled their eyes.

“I’ll see you at lunch Daniel,” Rod said and walked off in the opposite direction.

Daniel and Ann walked quietly toward the conference room. A huge smile came across Daniel’s face. So why is Daniel so happy? Because it’s been five years since he’s spoken to his family.


003: Indian Graves

One thing I find Douglas County lacking in, and it's something that each county surrounding Douglas has, is something that connects the county with the people who were here before the area was opened to settlement in 1854. Prior to 1854, Douglas County was part of the Shawnee Indian Reservation but most of the reservation that was in Douglas County was in present-day Eudora Township. Douglas County does have places and location named for Natives. But the only ones that come to mind are the Wakarusa River (reportedly a Native phrase for "hip deep"), Eudora (named after an Indian chief's daughter) and Blue Jacket's Crossing was a river crossing along the Wakarusa run by a Shawnee Indian. But aside from those, Native American names are practically non-existant in Douglas County.

One thing I wish Douglas County had more of were Indian burial places. Franklin County has the Ottawa Indian Cemetery northeast of Ottawa on the land that used to be the Ottawa Indian Mission. Franklin County also has the Chippewa Cemetery west of Ottawa plus the supposed burial of Chief Appanoose. The only Indian cemetery in Douglas County, that is known of anyway, is the Haskell Cemetery on the campus of Haskell Indian Nations University. Located near the intersection of Kiowa Avenue and East Perimeter Road, the graves are lined up in four rows and are a reminder of what the students who went to Haskell when the school first opened in 1884.

Haskell Cemetery.
The first burial was for Harry White Wolf, a six month old Cheyenne baby who died the first year the school opened. The last burial was in 1943, a Cecelia Mae Fiddler, a Chippewa from North Dakota was buried in the Haskell Cemetery. It is unknown why she chose to be buried in the school cemetery. The cemetery is currently maintained by Haskell University and owned by the U.S. Government under the administration of the Bureau of Indian Affairs.

Another possible Indian burial is in the area of Stull. A newspaper item from 1881 recorded that Isaac Stull uncovered the skeleton of an Indian, some pottery, teeth and other things. The items were found on the edge of an open spot popularly referred to as "Indian fields" by settlers. Two other remains were found while digging postholes on the Shaw place.

During construction of the Kansas Turnpike, the graves of two Indian children were disturbed. The children's coffins were made by Michael Anderson when their parents stopped by the farm in 1900 seeking a burial place. When the graves were unearthed, the coffins were broken and only bones remained. They were reburied near where they were found and their exact location, still near I-70, is unknown. It is estimated the bodies were a twenty year old male and twenty-one year old female, their names and dates of birth and death unknown.

In the Coon Point area in Kanwaka Township, there is a large mound covered over with native rocks. Apparently a larger rock marked the site but that rock is now gone. It is believed that this mound is the grave of an Indian and archaeologists from the University of Kansas believed it was the grave of an Indian chief since the mound was larger. The mound was never excavated so no one knows for sure if this is an actual grave.

I Was Born On the Mean Streets of Bloomfield Hills, Michigan


It's kind of nice to learn that Veeblefester worked his way through the muck to become the tea cozy magnate he is now but I don't buy it. I think by "few means" Veeblefester really means his family was making between $100-250,000 and so wasn't able to get his son an office job and had to start in the mail room.

I would've had Brutus say something in the next to last panel. Something like "His rise to the top really is remarkable...now if he could just do something about his breath." But what do I know? I'm not the writer and artist of a 45 year old legacy strip.

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Yes, Put This In Your Mouth


So I guess all doctors shove things in mouths and then expect you to talk about your symptoms and/or your day. Or this guy really isn't a doctor which is what I am putting my money on.

Friday, January 27, 2012

No Snuggling Zone

All the Republican presidential candidates have been talking about when they get into office that one of the first things they are going to do is repeal Obamacare or, more accurately and less insultingly, the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act. My question is, how do they plan on repealing it? They make it seem like they will just introduce another bill that effectively undoes the process but I know there are several things in the bill that both Democrats and Republicans like so those things are likely to remain. But my bigger question is, the United States Supreme Court is scheduled to hear the case on whether PPACA is Constitutional or not starting March 2012. What if they uphold it? What if they decide that it is Constitutional that the federal government make sure that the citizens of the country are insured? Has there ever been a Supreme Court decision that has been overturned by the Legislative branch on a decision that hasn't been deemed outmoded? I know a lot of Republicans promise to get Roe v. Wade overturned but most people consider a Supreme Court ruling the definitive answer until the case makes its way back to the court for some reason.

And even if the Supreme Court says PPACA is unconstitutional, that doesn't get rid of it. I feel all of the candidates are overstepping their bounds by saying they will repeal the PPACA because that is essentially saying that the American people are stupid and they don't know how a bill becomes a law no matter how many times they watch Schoolhouse Rock.

I also feel they overstep their bounds when they promise to get Americans back to work. The President doesn't create jobs.

I love this. I love to cuddle up with my wife in the car but it's hard to do because both of our cars have consoles in the middle. Clearly that's not the problem here and Gladys no long snuggles (Brutus hasn't moved!) because she now finds her husband just awful. She just doesn't know it yet.

Thursday, January 26, 2012

Brutus Loves a Raging Clue


I love reading. But I tend to never borrow other people's books because I don't know when I'm going to read. I could read it within the next month or I'll have the book for over year. Same with movies. I still have a copy of X-Men 3 my best friend loaned me a year ago.

And it is wrong that when Veeblefester mentioned The Hardy Boys that all I could think of was this:

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

It's Because Brutus Uses a Fork to Eat His Burger


I am always up for some really good hamburgers but I will admit that I would be a little leery eating at a place called Bodacious Burgers--especially in Ohio. But don't get me wrong. I am sure the Bodacious Burgers in Sedona is amazing.

Monday, January 23, 2012

Lum-De-Lum-De-Lie-Ay


I used to have it, then they changed what it was. Now what I'm with isn't it and what's it seems weird and scary.

You should be glad that Brutus is walking around singing "Lum-de-lum-de-lie-ay" and carrying a banana while still fully clothed. Usually the shirt or pants are the first things to go.

Sunday, January 22, 2012

I'm Here All Week


"I don't have any trouble using one hand after you say 'no' to me, Gladys! And that is one area where I am ambidextrous, so there!"

Saturday, January 21, 2012

Say It Ain't So

As you may have seen on my Twitter, I had a dream a couple nights ago where Mitt Romney was trying to defeat me for a political office. I blame this on all the debates, caucuses, primaries and random news I have been reading about the GOP candidates. I'm not really sure what office we were running for, I want to say mayor or something but what was really weird was that I wasn't actually running for office. Mitt, as far as I could tell, was running unopposed but kept trying to drag me into debates and showing up at my house and airing attack ads about me.

Mitt was doing a news conference and said "I would bring jobs and businesses to the city and if I had to, move them brick by brick to relocate them here. My opponent wouldn't do that. He would rather pay businesses to not move here and, in some cases, go somewhere else." Meanwhile, I'm at home screaming at the TV "I'm not running! Where would I get this money to pay these companies not to move here! How do you know who I am?!"

 Are Brutus and Gladys finally going to get that divorce that's been hovering over their head the last five years of their marriage? At least their divorce is expected, unlike these two's divorce:

Friday, January 20, 2012

Stull #25

It was early morning and Frank was already at the Society entering information into the computer. Frank woke up about two hours ago after a nightmare. Frank never went back to bed after a nightmare.

He left a note for Lana, who was still asleep at his place, explaining he was at work. Frank was currently working on a history of Brothel, Ohio, a small town located about a few miles south of Tontzville. On the surface, Brothel was a simple agricultural town with a shocking name but most of the buildings in the central business district were associated with prostitution.

For a little more than a year, Brothel was allowed to operate normally. But then Tontzville began interfering and wanted the town to shut down. Then, one day in April, the town was burned. The fire was put out but nothing was salvageable. It was soon discovered that all the prostitutes had been murdered and left in the buildings to burn.

It was never discovered who killed the girls, the town was dismantled and forgotten. Frank finished typing and read over what he had written before saving it.

The lights and computer then flickered and shut off. There was a loud rumbling and a series of small explosions followed. The glass in the Society's windows and door shattered and pictures fell off the wall. Frank could hear car alarms in the distance. He got up from his chair and went outside. The stairs to the Society were broken and he could see what looked like a fire just a few blocks away.

Frank took his phone and dialed 9-1-1. After one ring, an operator answered. "Yeah, I'm in Stull and I think there's been an explosion."




"Sinkhole"
The sun was now just sitting over the horizon. It seemed as if every deputy in the county was in Stull, every reporter and just about every citizen and firefighter were standing around the massive hole that had formed along 5th Street destroying much of the town between Ohio and Walnut Streets.

Frank, Katie, John and Lana stood near the sinkhole as well, looking at all the rubble and destruction. "So weird. It almost looks like someone dug underneath the town," Frank said, looking into the hole. "It looks like one elaborate tunnel under here."

"Well, whatever caused it, it destroyed Stull's main road, about a dozen houses, two churches and the ruins of the Old Stull Church," Katie said.

"It also damaged a lot of buildings downtown, including the Society," Frank said. "Is the house okay?" Frank asked Lana, pulling her closer to him.

"Some stuff fell off the wall but I think the house is fine," she replied.

"That is a giant hole! Is everyone all right?" Detective Bilko exclaimed as he and Caitlin approached the group.

"We're all fine. The Society is fine and our houses are fine," Frank said. "Look at this. It's like the ground underneath the city was excavated. Doesn't it look like there are tunnels running underneath?" Frank kneeled down and pointed this out to Detective Bilko.

"But who would do something like that?" Bilko asked. "And didn't they know tunneling would weaken the structural integrity of the ground above? I'm not seeing any evidence they used reinforcement for the tunnels."

"I'm going to get permission to go down there and solve this mystery," Frank said.


No. Not Even Close


You know what's interesting about this? This joke hinges on the fact that Phoenicians and Phoenix begin the same way when spelled but when actually pronounced, it's Foe-nee-shuns and Fee-nix, not Fee-nee-shuns or Foe-nix.

What I want to know is how many people in Phoenix actually call the old people there "Ancient Phoenicians."

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Four Years, One Day

Did everyone survive Blackout Day? I got a bit of writing done but unfortunately I still had the TV which meant I paid extra attention to what was playing on Cartoon Network. I really like that show "The Amazing World of Gumball." I do feel they show Johnny Test way too much and it's such a loud and seizure-inducing show.

I'm pretty sure your employer can't speak to you in that way but if they can I'd be more up for being yelled at by being called a nincompoop or birdbrain instead of a feeble-minded horse testicle or something like that.

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Workplace Gnomes?


Sweet Christ it is! Probably because the home offices of Veeblefester Incorporated were built on an Indian burial ground. What's more horrifying is that Veeblefester purposely exhumed graves from an ancient Indian burial ground, had them reburied where his company was going to go then began construction on his building thus disturbing the graves twice.

This blog will go dark tomorrow in protest of SOPA and PIPA, the two bills making their way through the House and Senate that essentially stifles creativity on the Internet. For more information, you can learn more here. As for the other two blogs Tauy Creek produces, there will just be no post on either of them.

See you Thursday and I hope to see a lot of websites down tomorrow.

Monday, January 16, 2012

Guard Your Ears...with Gorman's


I, for one, am ready for the FCC to start demanding that commercials cannot be louder than the TV show. Does anyone like it when the TV show is at a decent volume that you and anyone else listening can hear it BUT THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THE COMMERCIAL TALKING TO YOU ABOUT YOUR DIABETES TEST STRIPS COMES BLARING ON!!!! However I can see TV stations making both the show and commercials louder just to make up for their commercials not being loud anymore.

Ah, the roofie Veeblefester slipped into Brutus' coffee is working perfectly. What Veeblefester plans to do with an unconscious Brutus I am just going to leave to your own imagination.

Sunday, January 15, 2012

A Second Opinion? For This?


Rancid Veeblefester is a typical man in his fifties, maybe early sixties, so you have to start thinking that anytime after Veeblefester is finished talking about the strict diet his doctor is recommending, Brutus is going to hear a long, detailed story about his colonoscopy.

Saturday, January 14, 2012

002: The Italy of Kansas

The old redwood sign marking Prairie City.
The sign was damaged after storm and taken
down in 2007.
I've written a lot about Prairie City. It is quite possibly my favorite Kansas ghost town, probably because it's almost right in my backyard and there is quite a lot of remainders of the once-bustling town and, up until a few years ago, was well-marked. Preserving Prairie City is number one on my list of Missions I posted a few days ago.

Prairie City had an unusual start. It was founded in 1855 after an argument between Dr. William Graham and Henry Barricklow. The town was also founded by I.F. Greene and Salmon Prouty, who operated the first printing press in Kansas. The printing press was brought to Kansas by Jotham Meeker to use at the Shawnee Mission and then at the Ottawa Mission. The press was sold to Prouty. It is said James Lane was also a town founder but I have not discovered the extent of his involvement.



The Heber Institute
A post office was established in 1856, a Catholic church was started in a stone church on top of Liberty Hill and the Protestant Episcopal Church was planning on starting the Heber Institute. The Heber Institute failed before it started and plans for it to be a Boy's School also fell through. The building was then used for the Prairie City School District. A park was established in the center of town called Eden Park and Prairie City was considered the "Italy of Kansas". For awhile, Prairie City and Palmyra were competitors. Palmyra was on the Santa Fe Trail but John Brown stayed in Prairie City the night before the Battle of Black Jack in 1856 and Horace Greeley was visiting Prairie City when he coined the phrase "Go west, young man" which solidified Prairie City's place in history. However, in 1858, when Baker University was founded just south of Palmyra, Prairie City's fate was sealed. But Prairie City continued to grow, becoming incorporated in 1859 and at its peak had three stores and three hotels.

Hand-drawn map of Prairie City
Baldwin City was founded in 1860 with Baker University centered in the middle. Palmyra was annexed to Baldwin and Prairie City and Baldwin City lived a peaceful coexistence. When the Leavenworth, Lawrence and Galveston (LLG) Railroad was built through the area, a depot was built in Baldwin and Prairie City, with stops at both. Thinking that was impractical, both depots were closed and a new one was built in between and named "Media".  Media was later annexed to Baldwin City as "West" Baldwin. Prairie City continued to be a small community until March 24, 1883 when the Douglas County Commissioners ordered certain alleys and streets vacated.

The only remnants of Prairie City are a few older houses, the ruins of the Catholic Mission, which was closed in 1893 and replaced by a frame structure still standing at the corner of South and Miami Streets in Baldwin, the Prairie City-Mt. Cavalry Cemeteries and the LLG Railroad which is now used for the Midland Railway.

One of the houses still standing is a house on the southwest slope of Liberty Hill. It was built by George Miller in 1860 when he and his family came to Prairie City. The house was named "87" by local teenagers who had trespassed on the property to look at the house and view the two graves located on the southwest of the house. The graves are of George X. and Ignace Meunier. George X. died in 1865 at the age of 1 and Ignace died in 1872, on the day of his first birthday. George was born in 1832 in St. Lawrence County, New York and came to Kansas in 1858, settling in Lecompton. It was there he met Margret Lowery and they got married in February of 1859 and their first child, Adela was born in 1860. George and Margret would go on to have eight more children. George was a stonemason who farmed on 250 acres of land. He would pass away in 1909, with Margret following in 1925. They are both buried in Prairie City Cemetery along with two of their children Julia (1866-1955) and Robert (1874-1949). The Miller plot is marked by a giant stone family marker, probably made by George himself.

The house has been abandoned since at least the 1970s. It's still in decent shape however it is estimated it would cost roughly one million dollars to make livable again. I have been to the house several times, and my most recent time, I specifically went to get pictures. I took pictures of every room and tried to get as much of the essence of the house and I am sure I missed some of it but I need to go back soon.

I originally found out about the house when on a ghost-hunting kick with my friends. We would go out to the house, wander around and speculate around how the children died. When I found the graves listed in the Complete Tombstone Census of Douglas County, Kansas it just said the children died due to the harsh Kansas living. I tend to believe that and don't think there was actually anything wrong with the children. After visiting a couple of times I became interested in what the history of the house and the family was. I am still doing research on the family but I think I have done all I can with the history of the house.

Catholic Mission Ruins
The dilemma I am finding with the history of Prairie City is that it is hard to see if you are not looking. There used to be signs noting Prairie City along East 1575 Road, the Catholic Church Ruins along North 200 Road and the Heber Institute at the intersection of North 200 and East 1575. None of those signs remain and the last one standing is along the railroad tracks and points out the location of the Prairie City store, depot and post office. I was lucky enough to get a picture of the Prairie City-Heber Institute sign but the other signs are now lost.

Another abandoned house near the Miller House.
Prairie City Cemetery is also a good reminder that the town used to exist but it is a quarter mile east of the townsite and some people may not know that a cemetery may exist. I plan on working this summer on getting donations to erect a new sign telling the history of Prairie City and showing a map marking the location of houses, stores, hotels and past streets of Prairie City. I feel that with all the history surrounding Baldwin City with the Battle of Black Jack, Baker University, Signal Oak and Hickory Point, Prairie City is one area that is getting lost in the shuffle.

Friday, January 13, 2012

Playing the System

I am not a Frazz fan. I used to like but over the last couple years it has become pretty condescending and Frazz has become...how do I say this nicely? Kind of a douche. Thinking he's better than everyone else. Anyway, today's strip shows us that Frazz taught the students whose vomit he cleans what the "Native American work for 'elk' is."
According to my research, wapiti, comes from the Shawnee and Cree word waapiti, which means "white rump." No where did I find that wapiti means "big white behind/rump" or that the Shawnee and Cree are the only Native American tribes. Way to generalize, Frazz. Way to generalize.

Nice try, Brutus. Actually, not nice try. Terrible try. No employer would let you do that but I would attempt to use my sick days and basically use them as vacation days. And neither my boss nor HR would be none the wiser.

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Not-So Mister Teriffic

DC Comics has announced six new titles for the second wave of the New 52. New titles include Batman Incorporated, Earth 2, Dial H, Worlds' Finest, G.I. Combat and The Ravagers. But with these six titles comes the cancellation of six original New 52s. Men of War, Mister Terrific, OMAC, Static Shock, Hawk and Dove and Blackhawks will be coming to an end.

The only one of those titles I read is Mister Terrific because I like the character and it had a Justice Society connection that wasn't even mentioned during at least the first five issues. But what got me about Mister Terrific was that, unlike most of the other New 52 series, you never heard anything about Mister Terrific. In fact, with the exception of Men of War, OMAC and reading about Rob Liefeld's terrible art in Hawk and Dove, none of the titles being canceled made the rounds at the many comic blogs out there. I don't recall reading anything about Mister Terrific except someone complaining about how Power Girl was reduced to being Mister Terrific's girlfriend. I also saw something about how the backgrounds were being done by computers instead of an actual artist starting with issue #3, which is about the time most of the other titles ran into artistic troubles.

So how would I have handled Mister Terrific? Mister Terrific is the third-smartest man in the world and really, really rich making him essentially Batman without all the darkness. I would have explored how Mister Terrific is different from Batman and, if allowed, explored his possibly having a bigger role in the new universe and that may still happen as Earth 2 is supposed to feature the Justice Society, which Mister Terrific was once a member of, and Worlds' Finest features Huntress and Power Girl trying to get back to Earth 2 so Mister Terrific may play a big role in these titles as well.

Mister Terrific and the others will end with issue #8 in April.

"You're eating a salad for lunch? How could you do something like that? I mean, I just can't comprehend how you can be doing this! Are we in the Bizarro World or something. A salad?!"

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

Fool


...

Wastrel's wearing a jester's cap, right? I'm not just seeing things? Is there a reason he's wearing it? Is it time for another made-up, obscure holiday already?

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

He's a Loser Because He Chooses To Be

The last couple nights I've been having these weird dreams featuring what I am just going to call Ink Children. In these dreams, these Children are really just shadows of children. Shadows that have taken over the city and are hunting down and killing people. It's not really a scary dream as I am protected from the Ink Children by my own child who is apparently an Ink Child but also still human so he still has feelings and emotions but with the powers of an Ink Child--which mainly include enough strength to rip someone's head from their body.

I'm just wondering why there are so many people trying to kill me in my dreams....

 Now Brutus doesn't have the perfect life but he does have a good one. He has a good job that pays well and, most importantly, a loving wife and son. Brutus has a good life. He has a good life.

Well, running a tea cozy empire is stressful especially considering how useless tea cozies are and how they last a long time thus making buying a new one something that only happens every once in a while.