Sunday, July 18, 2021

Golf Pro

I didn't know that golf had different terms for the ball going left or right. I figured hook meant the ball did something while slice meant the golfer did something. Learn something new everyday.

There are just so many poorly chosen clothing choices in today's strip? Is Brutus wearing socks with sandals or are those loafers? Ew.

Saturday, July 17, 2021

Omelette du Fromage

"I made a healthy egg white omelet for you today!" Why? What did Wilberforce do to deserve this? Also, you just gonna stand there watching him eat this? He says it doesn't taste good, did you season this omelet? Is there some sort of meat or cheese in it? Did you put spinach in it? You put spinach in it, didn't you?!

Friday, July 16, 2021

Brutus Goes Through 20 2 Ounce Cone-Shaped Wax Paper Cups a Day

Cuz Brutus loves looking at dat ass!

I've already talked about how I feel about the stereotypical relationship Brutus has with Mother Gargle, I'm now just disappointed they've dragged the work watercooler into it.

Thursday, July 15, 2021

Why Are You Talking About Your Smartphone? Is It 2007?

Veeblefester isn't going to slum it with the peons at their watercooler. He's going to bring his own bottled water or have his own watercooler in his office or right outside his office near his secretary. I mean, I don't think Veeblefester would pay for water delivery for his employees but that's a discussion for another day.

Wednesday, July 14, 2021

Gloat Bloat

Maybe I'm just tired but that first panel made my brain fart. It almost doesn't match what's being said in the last panel.

Gladys already agreed that Brutus doesn't gloat. She can't take that back now!

Tuesday, July 13, 2021

Bad Bed

You have to break it in first. It doesn't just conform to your body after one night. I had a memory foam mattress for nearly ten years and it wasn't great. Then we got a pillow top mattress which was just the worst thing ever. We've had a new mattress for a few months now and it's been really good.

What are we talking about? Oh, yeah. Uncle Ted should take that crappy mattress back. Hopefully it's still under warranty or whatever and he can get his money back.

Monday, July 12, 2021

Dinner Again

I'm just going to copy and paste my remarks from Saturday.

Ignoring the time of day you might be reading this, what's the funnier scenario that dinner is "still thawing"? Is Gladys just making a TV dinner? Or is dinner just a few minutes away and her special surprise is still frozen?

Sunday, July 11, 2021

I'm Sick of Brutus' 'Woe Is Me' Attitude

Panel 1: Brutus and Uncle Ted are sitting at a table, each with a cup of coffee. Uncle Ted: "You look a little down, Brutus." Panel 2. Brutus: "It seems like everything that could go wrong lately, has!" Panel 3. Brutus: "Why does it always happen to me?" Panel 4. Uncle Ted: "You're not alone, Brutus. I've had my share of misfortune as well." Panel 5. Uncle Ted: "As they say, into each life, a little rain must fall." Panel 6. Brutus: "How do you handle those little rainfalls in your life, Uncle Ted?" Panel 7. Uncle Ted: "Metaphorically speaking, I try to dodge my way between the raindrops!"
Brutus has been sick all week so I don't know what could've possibly went wrong. Anyway, I've been reading this comic strip a very long time and I don't think I notice Brutus going through anything more than your average person. We all have those days, those weeks, those months, or even those years sometimes.

Saturday, July 10, 2021

Dinner Plans

Most people read newspapers in the morning while eating breakfast or shortly after arriving at work. If you just read the comics, those are available all day and you can read them at your leisure. This comic takes a different view if you read it in the morning ("It's 8 o'clock in the morning. Why do you care what's for dinner this early in the morning, you poor man's Billy Keane?") than in the evening ("It is almost dinner time. I wonder what I'm having for dinner.").

But I think we can all agree that Brutus is not the chef in this scenario. He's more like a waiter because he's bringing the food to you.

Friday, July 9, 2021

Why Are They Just Staring At Brutus As He Walks By?

Panel 1: Brutus is walking by with five o'clock shadow and a bathrobe on. Wilberforce and Gladys are in the background sitting in a chair, staring at him. Panel 2: Close-up on Gladys and Wilberforce. Wilberforce: "Dad is sick, so what is he smiling so much about?" Panel 3. Gladys: "Any day your father gets off work is a reason for him to smile."
I was not expecting a three-part storyline. I wonder if Brutus is going to the doctor today or if he just decided, like everybody else would, that he's just sick and can deal with that himself.

That robe probably doesn't smell pleasant anymore.

Thursday, July 8, 2021

Sick Day

Luckily Brutus has a doctor appointment tomorrow so he can get a note from the doctor excusing his work absences as required by the Veeblefester Tea Cozy Company Contract Updated Volume 41 (revised 2020), Section 4, Subsection C, Number 5.

Don't be like Brutus spreading your gross germs around to everyone. Go get your vaccine to stop the spread of not just regular COVID but that delta variant and that delta variant variant. Y'all yelled about herd immunity last summer, well, herd immunity doesn't work unless at least 75% of the population get sick or get vaccinated. Quit arguing and/or whining like a baby and get vaccinated.

Wednesday, July 7, 2021

Everything Hurts and He's Dying

Brutus should be happy he got an appointment in the same week. Aren't most doctors booked out at least three months? Maybe Brutus' doctor isn't very good. Or maybe my doctor is overly popular.

Tuesday, July 6, 2021

Aches and Pains

Panel 1: Uncle Ted is sitting at a table with a cup of coffee. Brutus is standing in front of him. Uncle Ted: "Something felt different when I woke up today...and it still does!" Panel 2. Brutus: "Gee. That could be something serious, Uncle Ted. In what way do you feel different?" Panel 3. Uncle Ted: "Nothing aches."
Oh, good, the handful of pills you take at the beginning and end of the day are starting to work. I guess I won't call and double your life insurance...yet.

Monday, July 5, 2021

This Is a Rude Conversation

Panel 1: Brutus and Wilberforce standing outside. Wilberforce: "You should see Mrs. Farr-she's gained a lot of weight lately!" Panel 2. Brutus: "That's because she's pregnant. She's eating for two now." Panel 3. Wilberforce: "How many are you eating for, Pop?"
I can't believe Wilberforce is nine-years-old and hasn't been talked to about discussing people's weight. Maybe you can write off this discussion as a "from the mouths of babes" thing but, again, at nine, Wilberforce should know how pregnancy works.

Sunday, July 4, 2021

Will You Be Reading or Watching TV or Just Sitting In the Dark With the Dog and Your Tea?

I get not wanting to deal with the crowds of people but those explosions will still be a problem. I'm going nowhere near our city's Fourth of July show, which is across town, but there will still be no fewer than four houses doing their own shows around me. It's not going to be that peaceful, Mother Gargle.

I'm sorry but I just can't look at Wilberforce's shirt without thinking of this:

Saturday, July 3, 2021


Panel 1: Hurricane Hattie is leaning over the top of Brutus' chair, looking down on him. Hattie: "Do you know what I admire about you, Brutus?" Panel 2. Brutus: "No. What?" Panel 3. Hattie: "I couldn't think of anything either."
Hurricane Hattie is by far my favorite character. I like how she picks on Brutus but it doesn't come from a place of stereotypical hatred like with Mother Gargle but because Brutus is the closest thing Hattie has to a father and she doesn't know how to handle that or the emotions.

Friday, July 2, 2021

Nitpicky Friday

Panel 1: Brutus, Gladys, and Wilberforce are sitting around a table, plates and glasses in front of them. Gladys: "Don't forget to eat your broccoli." Wilberforce: "Aw, but I hate broccoli!" Panel 2: Close-up on Gladys. Gladys: "I thought you said broccoli was your favorite veggie." Panel 3: Brutus, Gladys, and Wilberforce are all back in panel. Wilberforce: "It is...I hate all the other vegetables even more!"
Just eat your broccoli you little shit!

Like yesterday's "I came, I saw..." claptrap where it was supposed to be the segue into the joke, here we see Gladys using "veggie" in place of vegetable not because that's what you do or it sounds good but because Chip couldn't squeeze "vegetable" on that line.

Thursday, July 1, 2021

Through the Door Darkly

Panel 1: Brutus is standing in a doorway. Brutus: "Let's see..." Panel 2: Brutus, still in the doorway. Brutus: "Hmm..." Panel 3: Brutus facing the other way, not in the doorway. Brutus: "I came, I saw...sigh...I forgot what I was looking for."
Well, you did walk through a doorway which has been proven to cause forgetfulness. I feel that what Brutus says in the last panel is...stupid. Does Brutus normally quote Julius Caesar when he enters--or leaves--a room? That's not right.

Sunday, June 27, 2021

No. 9: Topeka Women's Club

The Topeka Women's Club was organized in 1897 by Lucy Kingman and Margaret McCarter. It was a conglomerate of the other ladies clubs in Topeka and focused on musical education and entertainment. The club would raise donations to send to school and other institutions. They helped families affected by the 1903 flood and were instrumental in getting manual training and domestic science into the schools. After World War I, interest in a permanent home increased.

The building was designed by Frank C. Squires and was published in the Topeka Daily Capital in 1921. Construction didn't begin until 1923 and was completed in 1925. Squires was thrilled with his design for the clubhouse, considering it possibly the finest building of it's kind between Chicago and the Pacific Coast. After completion, it was believed that the building was the largest clubhouse west of the Mississippi River.

In 1925, the women's club had over 400 members. Within a few years, the Women's Club building housed numerous civic, artistic, and social organizations. Sadly, through the 1960s and 1970s, membership in the club steadily declined and in the 1980s, the building became home to the Kansas Insurance Department. Thankfully, the state kept everything mostly as is. The Tiffany stain-glass windows remained as did the gothic lights. The major changes were leveling out the floor in the theatre and clamping down the dance floor on the third floor to install cubicles. After the Insurance Department moved in 2020, the building was considered surplus property and sold at auction.

Purchased by local investors, work immediately began to restore the building to its former glory--and function. The Beacon, as it will now be known, plans on becoming the premiere event space in Downtown Topeka. Shorty after beginning work, they offered tours of the building which I gladly went on. The Women's Club of Topeka building was listed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1982.

Entrance from 9th Street.

Tile entryway in the entrance to the theatre off Topeka Boulevard.

Beneath this floor is the original spring-loaded dance floor originally installed
in 1925. Plans are to release the springs so it can be used as a dance floor again.

Decorative seal above the stage in the theatre.

It's Fun to Say

Panel 1: Gladys is stirring something in a big pot on the stove, Wilberforce walks in behind her. Wilberforce: "What are you makin' for dinner, Mom?" Panel 2: Gladys turns around to face Wilberforce. Gladys: "I'm cooking bouillabaisse, I love it, but it's for mature taste buds." Panel 3. Wilberforce: "Oh, good! I love it, too!" Panel 4. Gladys: "Really? I wasn't aware you ever had bouillabaisse. Do you know what the main ingredients are?" Panel 5. Wilberforce: "Uh...I can't think of them right now. What are they, again?" Panel 6. Gladys: "It's basically a seafood stew, with fish, clams, and mussels. Are you still sure you love it?" Panel 7. Wilberforce: "Oh...Well, I guess I love bouillabaisse, except for its main ingredients." Gladys side-eyes the readers with a slight smile on her face.
Now this is a reason to wear that stupid chef's hat, not just making a slightly fancier grilled ham and cheese sandwich. I knew bouillabaisse was a soup/stew type thing. I did not know it was made primarily with seafood ingredients. Yuck. But I'm a 30-something free American. I don't have to eat what I don't like but if you enjoy it, then have at it. More of it for you.

I am taking a few days off to focus on my writing and research. I will be back Thursday with new updates. Don't forget, you can support my work by buying me a cup of coffee through Ko-fi.

Saturday, June 26, 2021

Sleeping In

Panel 1: Gladys is shouting up the stairs. Gladys: "Oh, Wilberforce! Daddy is napping--would you wake him for me?" Panel 2: Still showing Gladys at the stairs. Wilberforce: (off-panel) "With pleasure!" Panel 3. Gladys: "And this time, don't use the air horn!"
Wilberforce then proceeds to pinch Brutus' nose closed and covers his mouth causing Brutus to wake up in a panic unable to breathe.

Or maybe Wilberforce will just jump on Brutus' crotch. Sadly, we just have to imagine how Wilberforce will wake up Brutus.

Friday, June 25, 2021

Wacky Isn't a Word I'd Use for Hurricane Hattie But Whatever

Panel 1. Brutus: Ha! That wacky Hurricane Hattie! I asked her what topping she would like to order for our pizza party... Panel 2. Brutus: "And would you believe she said chocolate! Isn't that the craziest idea you ever heard?" Panel 3. Gladys looking up and smiling. Brutus: "Gladys?"
Geez. Just get a dessert pizza or, I feel this is a brilliant idea and would like to try it some time, get a normal pizza but squirt some chocolate syrup on your piece before you eat it. The sweet of the chocolate syrup and savory of the pizza probably blend together real good.

In an effort to be more inclusive, I am going to start adding alt text to the comic strips from today on. Aside from helping with search engines, alternative text allows blind and visually impaired readers to use screen readers to get a description of the image, can help people with sensory processing or learning disabilities, and is displayed if the image doesn't load or the user chooses not to load images.

Thursday, June 24, 2021

I'll Be Your Croque Monsieur

Okay. But that doesn't really tell me what croque monsieur is. Also, I don't know why Gladys is acting all fancy with her "French dish" because croque monsieur is basically just a grilled ham and cheese sandwich.

Wednesday, June 23, 2021

Business Trip

It's gotta be a pain in the ass to constantly switch tea cozy suppliers. Acme switches accounts every six months or so it seems.

I'll be honest, I don't really know how this works. Does Veeblefester make the tea cozies and Acme is a store that sells them? Does Acme design the tea cozy and Veeblefester makes them? 

Tuesday, June 22, 2021

He'd Be Right To Punch Brutus

Assuming that Chicken Kingdom is supposed to be the generic version of Chick-Fil-A, it wouldn't have burgers--just chicken.

What are chicken tidbits? Nuggets or are they smaller? Deep fried chicken eyeballs.

Sunday, June 20, 2021

No. 8: Robotmen of the Lost Planet, Part 2

ANOTHER FIVE YEARS?! They can develop electricity, weapons, and all this other stuff but are still wearing pelt and fur togas.

Clearly the robots aren't hunting any stray humans because the humans have been basically left alone for the last ten years. I mean, I get these weapons are in response to the massacre that happened ten years ago but it still seems very unprovoked.

They can't make clothes but they can make bedding.

Laurie is still a nightmare-looking young boy, isn't he?

"We work to make life better for our children." Bang-up job. Being massacred and forced to live in a cave for ten years is a much better life than what you had Alan.

Laurie looks different in every single panel.

Laurie's friend is named Johnson? Maybe they just call everyone by their last name but they're kids. It's weird.

Yeah, let the 9-year-old sleep with a ray gun. That probably won't end badly at all.

They definitely should keep downwind because hygiene probably wasn't high up on the list of things humans should accomplish.

oh darn im going to miss him

"I'm sure he left. Here are his footprints in the dirt."

"No, he wouldn't dare, you stupid woman. Laurie, where are you?"

"His footprints are leading outside..."

*pats Nara's head* "Women should be seen and not heard."

They've gone ten years without being attacked or hunted by robots. If there are suddenly robots making their way to the human's cave then I am going to scream.


So the "toy" ray gun actually works and they were going to let their child sleep with it. Good thing he faked sleep and ran off!

I was worried that the humans defeating the robots would be easy as pie and that there would be no drama. And it looks like I was right.

The humans were defeated by robots because robots were strong and humans were weak. Now, the robots will be defeated by humans because humans are strong and robots are weak. IT'S A SWITCHEROO!!

I still don't understand why the robots would make themselves more humans in order to feel pain. Seems like a very bad idea.

"Bring me back some robots, Dad!"
"I am not dragging one of those things all the way back here."

"The robots hate pain!"
Yes, as does everyone.

Did Alan chop that robot in half?

So the humans defeated all those robots within a day? And then just casually walk up to where the AA-Plus robot is.

Hey, it's the robot's Emperor Johns! He just has a slightly larger head?

Alan has a taste for killing now! What's to stop him from doing to his fellow humans what he's doing to these robots?!

They didn't even defeat the robots. They just took out the master robot and they all don't know what to do and run away? I expect better from the robots.

What? It's only three parts? And they basically do what the robots did to them? Is there a sequel where the robots rise back up in ten years? This ending isn't really an ending.

I feel empty inside.

Jim Torlo. The devious, evil guy planning murder is named...Jim.

What is the discovery? Is there a reason you aren't mentioning what your discovery does?

I think she's engaged to Jim Torlo.

I also think Jim does want Professor Ackley's money.

So Mary is, what? 23? 24? And Jim Torlo is somewhere between 48 and 52? How old was Vincent Price in the 1960s?

So it's some kind of Iron Dome-type thing? Not a potion or a pill? But yet he mentions formula.

Maybe Dr. Forrester here finally drove his test subject insane with the worst movie ever made.

"So you're going to kill me? Ha-ha! That's funny! It makes me laugh!"

"You won't be laughing when I'm through with you! Because you'll be dead and dead people can't laugh."

So the machine...dissolves atoms? Yep, sounds like comic book science all right.

Mary lost her father and fiancée in one night but who cares? Clearly the police don't. And neither should we. Good night, everyone!