Monday, June 30, 2008

Now I Want Coffee

OK, so the guy's not bisexual but he's better: he's homosexual. At least what's-her-name is honest in that she only wants to use him to "quench her own desires". Which actually is kind of disturbing to read in a comic strip.

Sweet Lord, is this flashback done yet? I don't care how Oop met Dinny. What about Oop's birthday that unfortunately led into this storyline. Can we get back to that plot now?

Great parenting. They won't let Brad live with Toni but they will let him live with that grinning pervert TJ.

If you're going to have someone try a different kind of coffee, get them a white mocha or something more espresso-y. Coffee with hot milk is something we can make at home. Get something more elaborate and flavorful.

Sunday, June 29, 2008

I Think This Is a Minor League Team

While I'm proud that Brutus is rooting for the home team no matter what, I would leave too. I'd give in and leave, thereby beating the traffic.

Also, this is completely opposite of the reaction Brutus had earlier about the awfulness of his team. Maybe it's just different in person.

I Like TV, Too

I make it a point to watch a lot of TV. I don't really know the aversion to watching TV considering all the drugs, fast food and childhood traumas that are out there. I think Wilberforce is perfectly fine right where he is.

Friday, June 27, 2008

SUV/Gas Joke Hybrid

I had forgotten all about Frank & Ernest. Another strip I can't believe is still out there. At least F&E is surreal enough to keep it interesting. I just can't believe Ernie bothered a doctor just because he bit his tongue.

Yeah, very few books have a chapter on what to do when your giant behemoth of a dog knocks you down and has his way with your ribcage.

Ooh, very topical. Next Chip will be talking about Hillary Clinton running for president.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Why Does Brutus Keep Setting Himself Up?

Wow! That's a lot of action for a newspaper comic strip. Seth a guy? Is that man bisexual? If so, I need to pay attention to this strip more.

Sometimes this is the most awesome grandpa ever. I could go for some ice cream now.

So Alley Oop was the original Coppertone ad? And five bucks says Dinny is still playing.

Oh, look. Another recycled joke about Brutus' stupidity. Please wait while I hold my aching sides.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Must Not Be Kansas Severe Weather

So ants have strippers? No more destroying ant hills for me.

"Aw, come on, Mom! It's not like we're going to do anything because I never seem to get any action."

Brutus' reaction in the second panel is completely unwarranted. It's just severe weather. Calm down. And it must not be too severe if they're not going to talk about it until the 11 o'clock news.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Better Late Than Never

I knew it was Garfield's birthday back on the 19th but I didn't really care. With this birthday, Garfield turns 30 which makes him ten years older than the average lifespan of a cat. He should be dead by now especially with the he eats and I know walking on his hind legs can't be good for him.

Why Are June Bugs So Disgusting?

Whew! Not much in a comic strip mood after my busy weekend but I think I can manage today's strip.

I looked up what a 'mayfly' is and saw that it is an aquatic insect so I'm kind of baffled as to why it's flying around Brutus' head. Mayflies also only live between 30 minutes to two weeks.

Just a fact...Use it as you wish.

Also, I learned that june bugs can also be called may beetles, so suck on that Brutus.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

A Couple Quickies

Whoa!! Do you mean to tell me that the bicycle is up his butt now? That's more than disturbing.

Are there people out there who really talk like Gladys? Most things you have to mix take a lot of elbow grease but you don't really broadcast it unless someone specifically asks you about it.

And Wilberforce is stupid.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Bleep You, Gladys

Ah, so now we know why this guru is stuck on the top of a mountain instead of in a church or something. As we learned from Obama, endorsement from Oprah is almost a death stroke.

Pig is my God now.

The one problem I have with serial strips are the ones that waste space and time. Who knows what could've happened in this strip if the writer would've done more than use the very original dilemma of the hunter becoming the hunted.

I used to like Pibgorn. Sure, it's been awhile but I don't even want to know what's going on. I can barely read this thing.

First of all, they don't "beep" you, they "bleep" you. And if Gargantuan Woman Gladys can't handle a little fucking swearing then I have no Goddamn remorse for anyone in this bastardized queef of a comic strip.

Saturday, June 14, 2008

Bet, Bet, Bet, Bet!

When I drew my own comic strip I had a couple really good strips but the artwork was terrible. And I mean bad. And that has fueled my bitterness and why I must now poke fun at people who do comic strips for a living.

Yes, how did Oop meet Dinny? Why is he called Dinny? Maybe it's because that's how dinosaur starts out and Dino was already taken. Damn you Hanna-Barbara!!

So not only is Brutus taking Wilberforce down the long, lonely road of gambling addiction, he's also going to take his son's money when the team loses as we all know they will.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Another Non-Brutus Day

Thanks for that narration, Dead-Beat Son. So she got the idea for you to take out the trash from your selfish ramblings? Looks like Momma's giving us the ol' reach around.

Do they really make solid gold checkbook covers? I did a Google search and found nothing on solid gold checkbook covers but maybe Herb knows some people.

And I hate the shape of Jamaal's head.

Nancy caught Sluggo cheating again and Sluggo is trying to apologize. I still can't get enough of Nancy and Sluggo's relationship dance.

Yep, nothing like hearing the Little Liversville Philharmonic. Take that Boston.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Boy On a Stick?

This comic caught my eye as I was scrolling through the list. Boy On a Stick and Slither. I'm assuming it's setting in around the time of Adam and Eve but I don't know. This is the first time I've seen it.

I chuckled at it because of the Boy's head on the stick, the joke didn't really ring with me but I chuckled out loud at the picture of Boy.

Heathcliff has exotic tastes and instead of buying a transvestite prostitute like your average guy, Heathcliff goes into a bird store and is promptly kicked out and bounces like a ball down Main Street.

So that's Lividea. She actually fits in with what I was thinking Lividea looked like.

I'm assuming "Brats" is short for bratwurst. Or maybe the Thornapples barbecued a bunch of snotty children. Either way....

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Something New

Alley Oop for June 11, 2008 unavailable
I figured I'd try something new here. I started going through the comics online and found out that they still publish Alley Oop? Oop began on August 7, 1933 and for some reason is still around. And it's a SERIAL COMIC!!! Yay! I will admit it though--I love the artwork.

If wanting to watch those shows makes me a Communist, then I guess I'm just a big Communist.

Will we actually see Brutus and Gladys' anniversary? Probably not. It'll be forgotten quicker than Fred Thompson's bid for President of the United States.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

I Wear My Sunglasses At Night

You have to admire Charles Schulz and his family. His wishes were to end the comic strip Peanuts and they did and the strip is just as relevant as it was back in the fifties. Then you have other strips (like B.C. above) whose creators have passed on. Does the family actually think Johnny Hart would want the strip to continue? If I had a comic strip, I'd want it to die with me. It's mine, damnit!! No, legacy-artist is going to take over something I have poured my heart and soul into.

Does cured ham smell when you cook it? I've smelled ham cooking before and it smelled pretty damn good. Maybe Wilberforce is just acting like a kid in today's strip and doesn't like anything that doesn't have two gold arches on the wrapping.

And Mother Gargle mailed the ham to the Thornapples?

Monday, June 09, 2008

Shouldn't She Be Dead?

Shouldn't Brutus' Kindegarten teacher be dead by now? I guess it would be possible for her to be alive if she was just out of teacher college but then I don't think Brutus would recognize her.

I also don't really understand the joke so I'm just gonna move onto the next strip which features Veeblefester in a bright pink robe.Is Veeblefester trying to get Brutus to work on his boat? I've never been on a sailboat but I'm pretty sure Veeblefester wants Brutus to work on a boat. I'd say no too. Yeah, sure I'm on a boat but I'm working. That's not fun.

Chip really knocked himself on the artwork in this strip. The way he added eyebrows on Gladys in the last panel just blew me away.

Friday, June 06, 2008

Fine. Here's Your Precious Brutus

I don't understand the "joke" in today's strip. Which is nothing new. What I laughed at more was the way Gladys detached head is sitting on her chest and that Brutus has a hammer sticking out of his pants.

Also, I may be gone this weekend as I am Internet-less when I am in Topeka and the future weekends are just as busy with a weekend in Baldwin next weekend, a wedding and reunion the weekend after that and Lecompton Territorial Days after that. Whatta June.

Comics and Games: Nothing Better

I found something fun online. (Really, Brian? Something fun that's online? You're pulling my leg.) Kitty Cannon. It's pretty self-explanatory. Enjoy. Thanks to Paul Arrand Rodgers, the guy who explains Heathcliff for posting the link.

In Girls & Sports, I find it amusing how all the people look the same. Don't get me wrong, I like the artwork but it looks as if everyone is related in some way.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Watch This Space

I’ve purchased the domain name I’m not really sure why but I’m hoping to do some things on it with my writing, mapping, opinions and possibly even start my own webcomic. I’m still adding some things to it but I should be able to update in the next week or so. It just depends on what I want as my return post because I’m using my abandoned blog, Watch This Space. Hope I can keep it interesting because it certainly wasn’t before.

Is Ripley Lying? Plus, Brutus' Job

I took a gander at today's Ripley's Believe It or Not (that's still being published?) and wanted to make sure everything was true.First up, Rio de Janeiro was once the de facto capital of Portugal which is actually an interesting fact. Secondly, de Martinville did predate Edison by about 28 years. Take that Edison. Think you're so great... And lastly, the thing about the Magna Carta is also true. You win this round Ripley.

I don't get the joke. Is it that not everyone is depressed when it rains. I'm not depressed when it rains. For once, Pearls Before Swine has confused me.

Also, this......has actually happened to me. I started talking to this girl who said she didn't have a boyfriend then found out later she had a husband. Good times had by all. I go home alone and she goes home to a husband.

Oh my God!! Veeblefester's multinational conglomerate that puts the Wal-Mart Corporation to shame makes tea cozies? Really? REALLY? I'm gonna start focusing on Girls & Sports, today's strip really makes me ashamed of The Born Loser. Even more so than usual.

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Chip Lives Off the Grid

I'd ride the toad raft...

And apparently Chip doesn't have any utilities so he doesn't know how they work. The water company (or cable or electricity or gas or trash) wouldn't send you a refund check unless you were moving. They would add the two dollars onto your account for the next bill. If I was Chip's editor at Universal, I'd point it out to him.

Actually, do you even think Chip's editor even reads The Born Loser when he sends it in? I'm guessing not.