Thursday, August 31, 2023

Gotta Watch Something

January 21, 1976
Just watchin'. I don't get it either, kid.

Is Hattie wearing pajamas or a clown suit?

Is it weird to watch both the 6 o'clock news and the 11 o'clock news? Is that not how people do it? While I think Brutus should be in bed, he can watch both newscasts, right? I think my mom does. Should I have her arrested?

Wednesday, August 30, 2023

What Year of 4th Grade Is This?

January 8, 1976
At least the other men Gladys is apparently seeing also have jobs. I'm assuming Gladys is joking here but what if she isn't? What if it was Toby or Wilbur? How is she going to explain her week-long absence to Brutus. "I'm going to Vegas for a week. See ya!"

Kids will just come up with another way to not do their work. "This tablet isn't working. The screen is just black" and the screen brightness is just turned all the way down.

Is "Hurricane" Hattie's actual name? Is it in whatever gradebook system the district uses? Whatever the reason, it's not that hard to use the name the kids prefer. You want school to be safe for them, right? Right?!

Tuesday, August 29, 2023

Are the Restaurants Even In Alphabetical Order?

December 23, 1975
Looking at him right now, no. Brutus never took shore leave.

I'm impressed that the uniform still mostly fits.

You should also have their websites saved in your bookmarks so you don't even need to save the numbers in your phone.

Lee Ho Fook sounds offense. Is it offensive?

Monday, August 28, 2023

Ten Weeks? Well, I Need Two More

Are we still in August? And we always complain that February lasts too long despite being the shortest month. At least February doesn't normally have several consecutive 100 degree days. Anyway, there are going to be a couple changes as the (mostly) daily Born Loser posts return. Classic strips will return as well and the post will be posted here and over on Post. I hope to use Post for other writings and some history things as well when I get them written. Be sure to follow me everywhere on social media where I do slightly more than yammer about a comic strip no one actually cares about.

December 17, 1975
Lying about where babies come from is always an eye-rolling trope for me, although I will admit that I always liked when parents claimed they got their kid cheap from Sears or K-Mart. The children were in the catalog at the back after the guns and gun racks.

I've been back at school since the 2nd, the kids have been back since the 8th so pardon me if I don't care about how Wilberforce feels going back on the 28th.

And he gets a three-day weekend right off the bat!

Sunday, August 27, 2023

What Do You Know Sunday?

Just let him read the damn book. I reread books all the time. I do it because I like them and I notice something new every time I reread.

Huh. I always pictured Uncle Ted living in a retirement community or senior living facility. Apparently, he still has his own house and is looking forward to watching his family have to sift and sort through his garbage from the afterlife.

Actually, looking at you, I would've guessed immediately that you played football in school.

I'm glad to see Hattie harassing Brutus. It's been awhile. We haven't seen her in a new strip since July 5, and she hasn't bullied Brutus since February.

"I know I said 'I love cheese' which to you probably means 'Give me a lot of cheese', but to me it means 'Give me all the cheese you have.'"

You just keep working that grater, cheese monkey. You'll probably want to grab another block as well. I just going to sit here and smile.

This is not a great way to handle potential sales calls. You should be having a secretary or receptionist transfer calls the sales staff, not have whoever gets to phone first gets the sale.

Has Uncle Ted seriously never heard about E-ZPass, TollTag, PIKE Pass, whatever your state calls it? Did he seriously think Brutus just zoomed through the toll and began thinking about turning in his nephew and if there would be a reward? Did he not see the massive signs along the toll road that explains how to stop paying at the toll booths?

I guess we're even. Uncle Ted doesn't know about cashless tolls and Brutus doesn't know what an MRI is. Maybe that's why Uncle Ted had an MRI done.

Can we get to eating and drinking now, or are those sandwiches and lemonade just for decoration?

Daily posts will return tomorrow since the start of the school year has settled down. If you would like to support my writing, research, or website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

Sunday, August 20, 2023

Wilberforce and Butch Kapinski should just kiss already

Wow. Sounds like a really shitty car dealership, Brutus. I'd go somewhere else.

I like when hold music is actually good. Puts me in a better mood to talk to you especially since if I am calling customer service, something has gone horribly wrong in my life.

What? Why? Is that in the employee handbook? Why is it a fine? It's not like he's burning popcorn or microwaving fish.

As a character, we know very little about this guy except that he works with Brutus. But I'm pretty sure we all just assumed, just based on looks and our few interactions with him, that he was a terrible husband. Lo and behold...

Technically, I think Wilberforce looks like a combination of Gladys and the coworker from the previous strip.

Also, I want to point out that it's weird for young boys to be talking about looks unless it's in an insulting way ("You and your big forehead-looking ass!") and Brutus shouldn't be so excited because your worth isn't defined by what two nine-year-old boys think of you.

I absolutely love this. I love that Brutus put on his apron and chef's hat. I love Brutus and Wilberforce standing at the grill watching the book go up in flames. I love the book being on fire. I can just imagine tonight at dinner, Gladys asks: "Was that book a great help in making a healthier meal?" And Brutus responds with pink meat juice dribbling down his chin, "The book was a very important part of the process."

"Your mother should be glad we even have a guest room that is actually made up to be a guest room! I could've turned it into a mancave. It could be a room to house all your BTS merch. Maybe a game room for Wilberforce. But I agreed to a guest room even though I hate having friends and family spend the night!"

If you would like to support my writing, research or website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

Sunday, August 13, 2023

Rancid & Lividea's Hawaiian Vacation

Headlines found during a search:

"Prices are going up and CEOs are making out like bandits"

"As inflation eats up worker wages, CEOs get a 7.7% raise"

"CEOs are driving Greedflation, raising prices to pay themselves more"

"How corporations are using inflation to take your money"

"One thing is beating inflation in this economy, CEO pay"

"How Excuseflation is keeping prices--and corporate profits high"

"Prices at the supermarket keep rising, and so do corporate profits"

So, no, someone doesn't have to be let go. You're just greedy.

And this, again, raises questions about Brutus' place in the company. Brutus seems really high up on the totem pole but gets paid crap. Who else is above Brutus? He only talks business with Veeblefester.

I just realized the copyright is 2018 so these are old strips and I've already commented on them. When this strip first ran, I made a long diatribe about voting and a special election in Ohio. This time, I'm going believe they are arguing about what the movie Barbie is about. Gladys believes it's a commentary on being a woman with sly commentary on manhood while Brutus believes it's about a girl getting her first period.

It's why Gladys is wearing pink.

Rich people have problems, too. *draws fake tear down my cheek*

I've never seen Brutus meditate so why is he suggesting it? "Have you ever tried meditation to help you relax, Chief? I personally haven't, but I've heard about it!"

I kind of thought these were reruns when I saw the preview for this strip talking about "superfoods" which is something people haven't mentioned since 2019.

If I were put in charge, I'd whip this place into shape and then steal money. Those moneybags are just sitting out for anyone to take. I doubt he locks them up.

This is Gladys' response to Wilberforce asking "What the hell is this?"

The Veeblefesters. Can afford. To pay. For their own trip to Hawaii! Although now is probably one of the worst times to win a vacation to Hawaii considering a good chunk of an island has burned down. That won't stop a bunch of selfish white people though.

If you would like to support the people of Hawaii and the residents of Maui, you can donate through the Hawai'i Community Foundation.

Here is the link to my original post for the first comic.

Sunday, August 06, 2023

The Great Portland Adventure (Not Shown)

Why does Mother Gargle get to dictate the menu? Is she helping pay for it? Is she helping cook it? It'd be one thing if she just showed up once a month but clearly she's been here for more than a week and we're on our second, maybe even third liver and onion dinner.

We're not at that point yet. Things that are in the can will still air, production has stopped on most everything else. Besides, there are hundreds, maybe thousands, of shows out there you can watch. You don't have to succumb to any of these things--especially the reality shows.

I don't even want to glance at the comments on this strip about how schools don't teach cursive anymore. They don't have time, people. They have to make sure the kid's reading comprehension is up to par before the four standardized tests they have to take during the year.

I thought Mother Gargle had recently sent Gladys a letter and I was like "But she spends 50% of her time at her daughter's house", but then I realized that it's probably a letter from when Gladys was in college or something. Replies for Gladys asking for money.

Common mistake I assume as most people are going to Portland, Oregon and not Portland, Maine.

Brutus had to drive to Portland?! That's an 11-hour drive! He had to have stayed in a hotel! Did Veeblefester pay for that? What about gas?! Good lord, now that's a business trip!

We had to come up with a one-word description of ourselves when we started back up at work. I didn't come up with one--I refuse to be dumbed-down to just one word. But I should've said 'steady' and saw how many people asked themselves "Steady? What the hell is he talking about?"

"I didn't go shopping, I stayed home and shopped." Brutus is now shopping online for how much quicklime he would need to dissolve Gladys and if it would damage his bathtub or pipes.

He's reading the manual for a universal remote, which is weird considering all it has is the instructions on how to program the remote and the codes all in seven different languages. What are you expecting to find? A way to remove laugh tracks? A way to give the vaguest description and still be able to find the actor you want to watch? A way to mute Gladys when she starts complaining about you watching too many sports games?