Our First Kiss Was During 'Sweet Caroline'

November 11, 1984

Just because he works in a health food store, doesn't mean he uses the products he sells.

I'm just gonna say it: We just can't come up with fake words to use as fake names like we used to. Boots Kettledrum is just so perfect. Nowadays, we all try to be too clever by half and come up names that obviously sound fake or are some sort of double entendre.

And you know "Boots" is a nickname and that his real, full name is Alexander Winstead Kensington Beauregard Kettledrum III.

I find it hard to believe that Mother Gargle didn't know where Gladys and Brutus went on their first date. I also don't think that going to a baseball game is a bad first date. There's no pressure, it's out in public so it's safe, and you can talk to each other during the boring parts of the game--which is like 70% of it.

If you would like to support my writing or research, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.