Using 'Monsieur' Very Loosely

June 22, 1966

Do you need to go somewhere, Alice? There are places you can go that will protect you from him. Can you go stay with someone? This guy does not seem to be as cool and fun as his namesake tiles.

You don't need an appetizer. It is just you. Just get some extra food or a side with your meal if you are that hungry.

The waiter's face in the third panel. "Oh, geez. Sounds like I'm getting a $5 tip with this one."

Worthless Boy of Summer

November 10, 1965

Technically, if he were to take one of those "when will you die" quizzes, I bet it would say he's already dead. "Am I already dead?" "Oh, no. That would be terrible. It says next Thursday."

Are the Scandinavian countries different than Europe? Maybe she's just more excited about being alone with those Scandinavian men. Or Scandinavian ladies.

I'm impressed the coach puts Wilberforce up to bat so much. Even if there's a "each of your players have to be up at bat" rule, coaches usually put those kids in when the stakes are low--not five times. Although I've been following the Weasels for years now and the whole team is pretty awful.

2022.

ChatBPT

I got the first issue of New Beginning years ago in one of those $1 for 10 comic books grab-bags. I don't know why I kept it for all these years. Probably because it's such an anomaly of 1980s independent comic books.

After publishing the first issue in 2010, I began trying to find the remaining issues. I knew there were at least two more and I finally obtained them through eBay in 2016, but during my journey, I discovered there was a fourth and final issue.

I got the final issue in 2020 at the height of lockdown and, wouldn't you know it, it ends on a cliffhanger. I'm open to promoting this long-forgotten comic book published by comic book store people if they have any interest in continuing it or revealing how the story ends.

You can read all three parts if you wish. Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3.

July 26, 1965

Remember when you need a massive machine with all these buttons, dials, and lights to spend five minutes figuring out 2 + 2?

I zoomed in that man just to verify that he was using an abacus. Sadly, it's a bucktoothed Chinese man with overly slanted eyes and a queue and looking quite dastardly so that's a shame.

AI is awful. I, for one, am glad that it is quickly showing it's awfulness. Quit stealing things other people have created.

For fun, I asked ChatGPT to offer some snarky commentary on today's strip: Gladys, always the bearer of doom and gloom, is at it again, warning about the perils of artificial intelligence. But Brutus, ever the nostalgist, can't help but reminisce about simpler times when the biggest worry was whether artificial sweeteners would rot your insides. Oh, how times have changed! Who knew that worrying about our appliances taking over the world would replace fretting over saccharin? Maybe he's onto something – at least with artificial sweeteners, you only risked a cavity, not a robot uprising! It's clearly trying too hard but the "robot uprising" comment is actually pretty good and now I'm sad.

At least Chip's job is safe. ChatGPT wrote a Born Loser and, for some reason, added a couple references to Garfield. The Thornapples don't even have a cat.

Panel 1:

[Scene: Brutus, the main character, is standing in front of a mirror, trying to squeeze into a too-tight shirt. His face is contorted in discomfort.]

Brutus (thinking): "Maybe I should've skipped that second helping of lasagna..."

Panel 2:

[Brutus manages to get the shirt on, but it's so tight that buttons are popping off. He looks ridiculous.]

Brutus: "Why do I even bother with shirts that have buttons?"

Panel 3:

[Brutus, defeated, stands in front of his mirror, shirt now completely unbuttoned and hanging off him like a tattered flag. His expression is resigned.]

Brutus: "Ah well, who needs dignity anyway?"

[His cat, lurking in the background, gives a deadpan look, as if to say, "Speak for yourself."]

Gladys Says It's Too Early In the Morning for Brutus' Crap

If you had a physical subscription or one of those hybrid you get both subscriptions then you could be looking at your newspaper without having to rely on your internet. I have to give props to Brutus for having a subscription to his local newspaper. It makes me think Chip has one as well even if it's just to see his own comic strip in print.

Maths Homework

The Crank

Joshua Hernandez Berkey was born March 11, 1852 in Post Oak Springs, Tennessee. As a young child he was moved to Wisconsin. His father, Jacob Berkey was a showman and traveled extensively, taking Joshua on the road with him until his sudden death in 1871 at 47. Settling in Monroe, Wisconsin, Joshua became a pharmacist but over the several years, became interested in the temperance movement to restrict alcohol. In 1880, Joshua moved to Denver where he became interested in journalism. He liquidated his assets in 1883 and moved to Sumner County, Kansas where he bought a farm and started a temperance newspaper called The Crank.

The Crank was an odd publication. In its first issue, it talked about the Confederacy and France. It threatened people who didn't take out an ad in the paper. It seemed to try to mix legitimate news reporting with humor but it doesn't really come through. Supposedly, The Crank became a popular newspaper with decent circulation. Unable to publish a nationalized newspaper in a small town such as Geuda Springs, Berkey ended publication with the tenth issue with a promise to continue publishing in Kansas City. There's no evidence that happened but multiple Cranks began popping up across the country and the popularity of Berkey's original catapulted him into good standing with the anti-alcohol movement in the country so much so he began traveling the country giving lectures. He left Kansas in 1891 returning to Wisconsin and even running for governor there under the Prohibition Party in 1896.

logo to The Crank

Berkey continued to run unsuccessfully for offices in Wisconsin under the Prohibition ticket, losing each time. He was found drowned in a lake June 17, 1911 in Crystal Lake, Illinois, the circumstances of his death at 59 unknown.

Hail Wakansa!

Wakansa was possibly a misspelling for Wakarusa. In this Lawrence Journal article from May 24, 1888, it mentions Mr. and Mrs. Orr of Wakansa Township. If this is mentioning Mr. and Mrs. George Orr, they lived on a farm east of Lawrence along what is now 19th Street.

This article from the Western Call out of Beloit on August 1, 1879, mentions the Atchison, Topeka & Santa Fe railroad laying track between Topeka and Wakansa. Again, it could be a misspelling as a town named Wakarusa is located in Shawnee County, which has a railroad connecting from Topeka.

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Dick Tracy

You had him! You had Dick Tracy right where many only dreamed to have him and you get distracted by a bird?! You deserve that kick in the face.

The Born Loser

For the most part, you won't be using math--no offense to math teachers out there--except in very specific circumstances. The biggest is, of course, controlling your own finances and budgeting. Next will be figuring out percentages. Anything having to do with shapes probably won't get used unless you need to figure out the area of something. The biggest thing that math gives you is helping you problem solve, to go back and check your work to see if what you did was correct.

The Comics Kingdom website is down again. I don't know why because who would want the population of the world to miss out on this...

Wilbur Weston has just fallen to his death!! I know we should all be saddened by the death of this...well, I don't want to say beloved...character but let's just think of this as a new beginning. Besides, Wilbur was fated to die on a cruise and despite the gifting of a cat toy, Libby the Cat plays for keeps.

If you would like to support my writing or research, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

Paper Swap

Cleveland only has one newspaper--the Cleveland Plain-Dealer which has been published since 1842 so what newspapers are they reading? Don't tell me that Chip--and therefore The Born Loser--live in a world where cities still have multiple major newspapers, which hasn't been true in Cleveland since 1982.

Another question I have is why does Brutus get so mad at someone asking to look at his newspaper? Does this happen a lot and do the people just run off with it? Do people borrow Brutus' newspapers and spoil all the news for him?

Like Gladys Needs An Excuse to Eat Chocolate

In Captain Marvel Adventures #26 in 1943. He was the mastermind of getting all of Captain Marvel's nemeses together to defeat him in a storyline that began in Captain Marvel Adventures #22 and ended in #46. Mr. Mind would be a thorn in Captain Marvel/Shazam!'s side for every other incarnation. He recently made a reappearance in Shazam! #2 last month. Mr. Mind technically first appeared as a voice but is physically in #26. Can you spot him?

I am also working to get "collected editions" of Story Series written and posted. You can see the link in the sidebar. Currently there is only one, Catman, but more will be added every month as I get them formatted. If you would like to support my writing or research, you can buy me a cup of coffee on Ko-Fi.

Coughing is usually suppressed just by having something coat your throat. Chocolate is very good at that. I looked this study up and the study was only conducted on 163 people in Europe but they were given either cough medicine with codeine or a chocolate-based medicine called ROCOCO. People using ROCOCO lost their cough quicker. But I bet the group taking codeine felt really good.

He Yam What He Yam

Getting this tribute to Popeye just in under the wire, aren't you Chip?

Popeye, as we all know, originally starred in E.C. Segar's Thimble Theatre which started in 1919 and originally starred Harold Hamgravy and his girlfriend Olive Oyl. Popeye first appeared January 17, 1929 and soon became the strip's star. Thimble Theatre was renamed Popeye in the 1970s. So while we're all honoring Popeye on his 90th, let's all wish Olive Oyl a happy 100th.

That's News?

Thankfully, this 'super duper foods' thing is fake. There are no such things as super duper foods and, God willing, never will be. Jeez, you give the name 'super food' to something and suddenly everybody wants to eat a banana.

Kansas In the Union!!

Kansas Admitted!

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Reception of the News!

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Yesterday Morning, The Conservative, in an extra, announced to the people of Leavenworth the long-wished for and glorious tidings of the passage of the Kansas Bill. The news flew like wild-fire. Men seemed to forget all other considerations, and to unite heart and hand in giving expression to the universal joy. At every corner might be seen throngs of enthusiastic people giving vent in cheers to the general gladness. At an early hour a large number of the members of the bar waited on Chief Justice Ewing and Judge McDowell, with their congratulations, and spent with them an hour of unwonted hilarity. About noon, old Kickapoo, in the presence of a joyous crowd, sent forth, in thunder tones, a greeting to the now sister State of Missouri. The day was given up to general rejoicing. Those who entertain the singular notion that the people of Kansas did'nt want to be admitted, would have been startled by the demonstrations of yesterday. Then hurra for the STATE OF KANSAS! Our days of probation have been long and tedious, but we believe the future, upon which we are about entering, will amply compensate for the dangers and toils of the past.

LET US ALL REJOICE!

In the troubles of Kansas was created that great party which, at the last national election, gave to the nation a President. Our position, as the battle ground upon which the new slavery issue was fought, gave us a prominence for which subsequent events developed our fitness. Upon us--a new people--emigrants and soldiers of fortune all, was precipitated the most momentous question which has ever yet agitated the American people. We met the issue. The history of Kansas, even now, stands prominent in the annals of the nation. To rehearse the story of the struggle between slavery and freedom in his Territory, would be but to recount a story familiar to the whole civilized world. Now is not the time or place for such a history.

The election of Lincoln, glorious as was the triumph, was, in our estimation, far less important and decisive than the admission of Kansas. Against our devoted people have been arrayed the whole force of the slavery power. The ingenuity of the pro-slavery partisans has been exested to its utmost to prevent the recognized expression of the will of the Free State people of Kansas. Every resource having been exhausted, the president, manly efforts, and the godlike courage of our people have at last prevailed, and the glorious reward, so gallantly earned, has been doled out to us with an unwilling hand. Yet we accept the boon--accept it gratefully, and hasten to take our place as a free State in the glorious Confederacy. Knowing as we do, the resources of our State, and the courage and endurance of our people, we feel that this accession will go far to fill the gap made by the seceding States.

Our people have an abiding love for, and a loving faith and confidence in the Union. This love and faith has been bred in the bone--it has stood the test of desertion, and even oppression; but is as strong and confident as ever. For them, we send greeting to the sister States, and if ever the time should come when the Union and the Constitution should call for defenders, we pledge the faith and the strong arm of that gallant people, who, for the institutions they loved, have heretofore trod the wine press of oppression, and come out unscathed in honor from the trial.

Then, to our Republican brethren of Kansas, we send one joyous greeting--to Republicans everywhere we extend the same joyous greeting. The grand stimulating triumph of Republicans has been achieved. Kansas has been admitted.

WE WILL FIGHT FOR THE UNION.

The news of the admission of Kansas, announced by THE CONSERVATIVE yesterday--and only by THE CONSERVATIVE, no other paper in Kansas having the news--was the most important that ever reached our borders.

Kansas was organized as a Territory more than six years ago. The bill organizing the Territories of Kansas and Nebraska became a law in May 1854. Up to that time, all territory north 36° 30' had been declared free by the Missouri Compromise. The Kansas-Nebraska Bill abolished the Missouri Compromise, and left the people of those Territories, as it said, "perfectly free to regulate their domestic affairs in their own way." The Administration, however, as well as the framers of the Bill, were in favor of slavery. The terms of the Bill were popular, their real intent and meaning despotic. South and North entered the field after the enactment of this law, and made a trial of their strength. The Federal Government and the Federal troops were on the side of slavery; but the FREE LABORERS of the North were too powerful for their opponents. For the first time in the history of the country, Slavery was beaten, overpowered, driven from the field.

The terrible fight between slaveocrats on the one side, and honest freemen on the other, we cannot rehearse here; we can only say that the same thing occurred in Kansas which will always happen hereafter. The North whipped the South; "greasy mechanics" and "mud sills" out-emigrated the chivalrous and high-born aristocrats of the South. Against power, against money, against every social advantage, the "poor whites" fought their way through and triumphed.

Since that victory was obtained, Kansas has gained more rapidly in population than any other State in the Union. The free States contain more than two-thirds of the people of the whole Union; their political principles are based upon the eternal, democratic principle that "all men are created equal;" and when the slave States beat the free States, the Devil will beat God. Unless infidels are right, unless injustice is the rule, unless hell is heaven, then Freedom is the ultimate destiny of the whole human race. Yes, of the whole human race. We speak the words of inspired truth, as well as the hopes of finite creatures. As sure as we live under a Divine government, all men will yet be free.

Long and impatiently have we waited for admission into the Union. We first asked for a State Government under the Topeka Constitution--which the House of Representatives adopted in 1856. Next under the Leavenworth Constitution. More than a year ago, the Wyandott Constitution was presented to Congress--it did not become a law until Monday.

An instrument purporting to represent the people of Kansas--though everybody knew that it was a miserable lie, and represented nobody but South Carolina--known in history as the "Lecompton Consitution"--was forced through Congress in 1858. It didn't come to anything. You can't buy up the people of Kansas. It was killed, killed, killed.

But amid the enthusiasm of to-day, we have no time to review our past political history; it is known to all mankind.

It is sufficient to announce to our people that we are at last a State. They will rejoice everywhere; on all our prairies, on every hill side, in every valley, when the glad news reaches them. One universal shout will go up from every heart for the Constitution and the Union.

Whatever other States, urged on by prejudice and fanatic zeal, may say or do against our country and its glorious flag, the people of Kansas with one heart and one voice, will fight forever for that Union, under which our liberty was first secured, and through which it has ever been maintained.

If the dread necessity shall come, if an appeal shall be made to the arbitrament of the sword, we will fight for the stars and stripes till the last enemy is vanquished, till the last drop of blood oozes from our veins.

The preceding was reprinted from The Daily Conservative, January 30, 1861. Published in Leavenworth, The Conservative was the first newspaper to announce that Congress had approved Kansas to be a state. 

Tauy Creek Digest #19: The City Band Concert

Rebekah Ames walked with Ely Jones into Garfield Park where the annual city band concert was about to commence. She had a camera around her neck while Ely had a notepad and pen in his left hand. Every year the city band concert drew hundreds of people. It had started out small but had grown to become an all-day festival with vendors, games, contests, and many other things to see and do.

"So we're just here to get some pictures and some quotes?" Rebekah asked. Rebekah had just graduated to be a photojournalist and she was hired by her local newspaper to be the photographer for the lighter side of the city. Ely had been with the paper for several years and was doing the same thing but he wanted to do it. Rebekah wanted to be a featured photographer going to crime scenes and political events but knew she had to work her up to get there.

"Yep. Just get pictures of people having fun. I'm going to grab some quotes from people and describe the scenery and then we can just enjoy the concert," Ely said.

Rebekah began taking pictures of children playing, couples sitting on blankets, people eating, and crowds. She also got pictures of the gazebo where the concert would be held and scenic views of the park to showcase the beautiful day. She took down the names of the individuals that she photographed into a note-taking app on her phone and quickly typed down possible captions for the pictures. As the sun went down and the concert began, she took pictures of the band on the gazebo and even went up on the gazebo to get a picture of the crowd.

Her pictures were going to be showcased in a two page spread in the middle of the local section of the paper. Each page would have five pictures surrounding text that Ely had written. She spent the next couple of hours at the newspaper, editing and formatting the pictures she took and trying to decide which ten of the nearly one hundred she took would be included. The ones she chose featured kids with their face painted or eating, a couple crowd shots with the limestone courthouse and red brick city hall in the background, two men shaking hands with big smiles on their faces in front of a crowd of people, a shot of the band from the gazebo looking over the crowd and pictures that gave you a sense of what the atmosphere was like. She sent the information she had for each picture and went home for the night.

The next morning, Rebekah arrived at work and saw the newsroom bustling. She took a copy of the newspaper that staffers got for free and went to her desk to look at the spread from the concert. As she began opening the paper, the editor came up to her desk. "Rebekah, did you know what was going on when you took that picture?"

Rebekah raised an eyebrow. "What picture? From the concert?"

The editor took the paper from her and laid the spread out on her desk and pointed to the picture of two guys shaking hands. "That's city councilman Geoffrey Farmer shaking hand with local developer Doug Hopkins."

"I know. Ely told me because I forgot to grab their names," Rebekah said. "What about them?"

"We got a call this morning that they were shaking hands because they just made a deal for Hopkins to buy property over on 17th Street to build a hotel and commercial plaza. Hopkins is going to ask the city council tonight for tax abatements. The property is owned by a relative of Farmer's and Farmer stands to gain a tidy profit from the sale and investment into Hopkins idea."

"Wouldn't this be like Farmer taking a bribe? Or close to it anyway?" Rebekah asked.

"Yeah," he nodded. "And you got proof."

"I didn't hear them talk about anything though," Rebekah said. "I just took a picture of two guys enjoying the park."

"The caller told us and we looked into it. Everyone we talked to basically said the same thing. Hopkins was going to massively overpay for the property, Farmer was going to get a small profit from his relative from the sale, Farmer was also going to convince the rest of the council to approve the tax abatements, Hopkins wouldn't have to pay taxes on that property, Farmer would then invest in the plaza, and both parties make a decent amount of money. And you took the picture that will damage both of their reputations."

The editor was ecstatic and walked away. Rebekah just stared and then looked back at the picture. "It was just a city band concert..."

1266: May the Odds Be Ever...Ah, Forget It

I don't play the lottery very often. I usually play when the jackpot gets into the hundreds of millions of dollars even though I know I would have a "better" chance of winning if the jackpot was only a million or two dollars. I'm like Brutus, I'm never going to win no matter what the odds are.

1228: Still Not Sure How I Feel About Uncle Ted

"I usually start out reading about what Obummer is doing. Did you know he wasn't even born in this country? He wants to give us all healthcare and gay marriage and equal pay for women to distract us from the real problem--immigrants from Kenya coming into our country from Mexico. Also, Benghazi."

You know what section of the newspaper I read first? I scroll through the news articles of the day and see what catches my fancy. On the rare occasion I read a physical newspaper, I read the local and national news first. The one section I don't touch. Sports. I already get enough information on sports, teams and player that I don't care about from Twitter.

1194: But I Guess You Can Also Deep-Fry It

Since kale is essentially just lettuce or cabbage, I would assume it will be used like lettuce on top of burgers, in side salads and crumbled into other things. According to news, the kale will be part of breakfast bowls.

I'm fine with adding kale to stuff but I feel adding it to the food at McDonald's is basically the equivalent to ordering everything on the left side of the menu and then washing it down with a Diet Coke.

You're the One Watching Me Read the Crossword Answers

Back in middle school, I was in home room reading. I can't remember what I was reading. It was either Adam of the Road or Time Cat but I know it was one of my favorite books at the time. I was sitting across from this girl and she kept staring at me while I was reading. I finally looked up from my book and asked, "What?" She looked at me and responded, "Nothing. You're just weird."

I can't even remember what my response to that was. I think at most I shrugged and said "Okay," and went back to reading. What are you supposed to say to that? I could've asked why I was weird because I was just reading or made it seem being weird was kind of cool by going "And?" but I just went back to reading, which is probably the best choice in this scenario. Anyway, what I'm getting at with this is that...

...that girl grew up to be Gladys. Gladys even has the same hair style that the girl did back then. Luckily, it seems as if Brutus has figured out a way to tune her out.

Happiness Is a Newspaper Tour

Last week, on the 2nd, the comic strip Peanuts debuted 63 years ago. It lasted until February 14, 2000 when Charles Schulz, who was retiring due to colon cancer, passed away on February 12th. What follows is an eight-page comic detailing Charlie Brown and Lucy's tour of the newspaper offices of the Des Moines Tribune and Register. Thanks to Hogan's Alley for posting these back in 2012.