"When you're retired like I am, time is meaningless. It makes me think of everything I have wasted when in my youth. Relationships. Family. Fun. All innocent victims of time. Now, I'm old and have been closer to my death than my birth for years and cannot enjoy the things I wanted to in life. Don't make the same mistake I did, Wilberforce."
"Jesus Christ, Uncle Ted, I just asked you what your favorite day of the week was."
