The Children Are Threatening to Riot

December 12, 1966

I think I mowed my last for this season. I last mowed a couple weeks ago then Fall arrived.

You know, that tall grass will still be there after the Spring thaw.

You're out of candy? Then turn that porch light off and ignore the trick-or-treaters. You are not obligated to keep an endless supply of candy around.

For our last Halloween post is "Emily In the Cellar" from Liberty Horror #6 (2022). Emily has spent the last five years locked in an abandoned cellar. Why is she down there and will she be able to leave?

👻Happy Halloween!🎃

Halloween Eve Quickies

December 10, 1966

Why do you need your skateboard (skate board)? There is clearly several inches of snow outside and it's the middle of December.

He's gonna have a nasty bruise on his back.

Chip, coming up with the joke of today's strip: "God, I hope Muenster cheese is a good cheese to make a grilled cheese sandwich out of..."

Next up on this year's Halloween Week is my archenemy Capt. Kid. Capt. Kid goes up against the Ogre of Haunted Mansion! This story originally appeared in Captain Marvel Adventures #7 (Feb. 6, 1942) from Fawcett.

Where's Brutus Supposed to Be?

December 9, 1966

Ooh. I love when my freshly clean clothes smell like a damp basement.

What's a Idaho Baking Potato? Are you just asking for a potato? I guess we know whose pocket Art Sansom was in back in 1966. Big Idaho Potato.

South Carerdddd The only difference is that Brutus isn't the fucking president of the United States.

To be fair, it looks like everything in that room has gone missing except the desk. Some sort of supermassive white void...

Next up on this year's Halloween Week is "Ghost of A. Chantz". Dominic, Ryan, and MaryJane win a radio contest and all they have to do is spend a night in an old haunted, abandoned house. This story is more humorous despite appearing in Liberty Horror #4 (2020).

To Err Is Human

December 8, 1966

Throw snowballs at me all you want, you're still gonna do this. Maybe I'll even pay you at some point, but the snowballs won't help you get there.

Why is she so concerned about her son shoveling snow? Does he have a weak heart or something? Sure, your husband can shovel snow until he strokes out but god forbid Junior break a sweat.

Veeblefester admitted it! Brutus is next in line! Just kidding, Brutus will never take over the company. Veeblefester will liquidate it at some point, firing all the employees.

Next up on our Halloween Week is a two-fer! First up is "Monsters for Rent", small business owners decide to create some excitement at their local lake. Then, an old childhood squabble turns deadly. Both comics appeared in the title Haunted Thrills from Ajax-Farrell.

I Think I Got the T9 Numbers Right

December 7, 1966

Well, he's dead.

I've never understood how people run out of gas. Although, full disclosure, I have run out of gas once in my life and it was because a gas station was slightly further away than I could manage. Is that how it normally happens? You pass a gas station because the next one is 10 miles away but you only have enough gas to take you five or six miles? I wouldn't even be able to walk to get gas because I don't have a gas can in the car. They specifically say not to keep them in your car.

I know that Brutus is using a smartphone here but since he's using his thumbs to type, I am imagining him using T9 to text Gladys. "4555239997777, 444 55566688833 99966688. 7555332777733 333666777444488833 633."

Next up on our Halloween Week is "The Scream", a story I wrote for Liberty #55 (October 2015). New homeowners discover that their house also comes with a disembodied scream.

And He's Not Going to Use the Elevator

July 26, 1987

Newton Veeblefester. Huh. We need more strips like this. Not stealing an old dying man's money, but, well, actually I guess that is what I want to see more of. Odd-ass gags that make people raise an eyebrow.

I guess it's time to change my name to Newton Veeblefester and go a-grave robbing.

I don't even know where to begin with this one. I guess with the panel where Veeblefester offers to push Brutus around in the chair. I don't care if they are going to the dumpster, this seems out-of-character for Veeblefester.

It's Halloween week so I will be showcasing some old Halloween posts over the next six days. First up, a mysterious fog is killing people aboard ships. Will the crew of the Vulcanus meet the same fate? "The Vampire Fog" from Weird Horrors #1 (June 1952, St. John Publications).

Monday Quickies

December 6, 1966

No. And Brutus will never get a raise. 59 years of never getting a raise. Brutus is probably still getting paid 1966 money.

Pour some bleach or drain eater down there to destroy the hair. Any idiot can do it, you don't need to bother this idiot with it.

Quality Time

I decided to look into who this Dorothy Grace person was who helped inspire(?) yesterday's classic comic. Now, I am not positive but Dorothy Grace is more than likely Dorothy Grace (Stapleton) Hamlin. In 1926, Dorothy Grace Stapleton married Vincent Trout "V.T." Hamlin. V.T. Hamlin was the creator of the comic strip Alley Oop, which continues to this day after 93 years. It would make sense that Art Sansom would be friendly with the Hamlins as Alley Oop was still going strong in 1966 and Hamlin would stay on the strip until 1973. Alley Oop and The Born Loser were also distributed by the same syndicate, Newspaper Enterprise Association. The Hamlins and the Sansoms were clearly close as Wilberforce would make an appearance in an Alley Oop comic in 1970 and, I believe, Oop makes an appearance in The Born Loser in the background.

Dorothy would pass away in 1985 at the age of 82. V.T. would pass in 1993 at the age of 93.

Dorothy and V.T. Hamlin circa 1928.

July 19, 1987

Wastrel is still so drunk that he doesn't know if he's coming or going! I originally thought Wastrel was trying out a new schtick, but then I realized he's that drunk off his ass.

It's time once again for Brutus and Uncle Ted to talk about Uncle Ted being old. It usually is a Sunday thing these days. I guess it takes 6-7 panels to really get the idea that Uncle Ted is old across.

Note the "including you" part. Uncle Ted knows what he's doing here.

One of the last research things I did on Twitter was updated and reposted yesterday--the arrest of Underwood Taylor. If you would like to support me or this website, you can click the Support page at the top.

It's Only Been Six Weeks?!!

December 5, 1966

God, when the last time I heard the word "rutabaga". Have kids these days ever heard of a rutabaga? While looking up rutabagas, I learned that people sometimes put them in pastries and I hope those kind of people are not a part of your life.

Yes, thank you Dorothy Grace.

So Wilberforce and Hattie started school after Labor Day, which I know a lot school districts do. Unless you are going by when Chip finished this strip which was at least two weeks ago so Wilberforce and Hattie started school on roughly August 18th. I don't know why I'm dwelling on this except that I wish my district started after Labor Day, but I would still want to be done by Memorial Day and that's impossible to schedule without getting rid days off in our long breaks.

I like that Wilberforce and Hattie are on their way to their own local No Kings rally. Surprised they didn't make signs. Be safe out there, kids.

Underwood Taylor

Back in 2021, KMUW in Wichita, Kansas posted an article on Kansas' racist past. Being nearly a year after the murder of George Floyd, the article talked about how racist Kansas was from its original settling to today and how we are trying to reconcile with that. The article mainly focused on the renaming of Noose Road in Hays to Rome Road. They also remind Kansans that while we were a Free State and founded by abolitionists, that didn't necessarily mean Kansas wanted Black people--free or enslaved--residing next to them. It's a really good article you can read here. Many of the names mentioned as being racist have been changed in the last few years.

Going over the map of racial violence, there was one that stuck out in Baldwin City. I lived in Baldwin for six years and there was never more than one Black family and maybe a couple college students that lived in the town so I wondered what this threatened lynching was all about.  In May of 1909, Underwood Taylor was a man from Missouri hired to work on the waterworks plant. He had said that he was originally from Missouri. Minnie Hackett, a five-year-old girl, was playing on the sand pile with some friends when Taylor walked by. Taylor was able to get Hackett alone. Soon, the little girl was crying and running home. Underwood Taylor was arrested and taken to Lawrence as Mr. Walter Hackett, Minnie's father, and other men in town were threatening to deal with Taylor their own way.

Taylor said that he was innocent of the charges and that he was just playing with the girl and offered to tie her shoe. Taylor was quickly convicted, given 30 days in jail, and ordered to pay a $20 fine. He then, presumably, left town.

The last mention of Underwood Taylor was in 1919 in Independence, Kansas where he was sentenced to jail for stealing seven bushels of coal from his employer and then escaping from jail.

That's Not Why

December 3, 1966

I do not like nor do I really understand the "R.W. Veeblefetzer (NOW HEAR THIS!) President!" visual gag that happens nearly every time we see something that could have words printed on it.

It's weird that the company has a void room. That could be someone's office but you're using to house a void.

I feel like if Brutus wasn't getting promoted because he was a born loser then he'd be better at his job. Brutus isn't getting promoted because he's a bad employee. Also, as I've mentioned before, Brutus seems pretty high up on the chain of command. Maybe he's already reached his summit.

Bad Manager

December 2, 1966

Ooh. Hope that recreation room isn't carpeted.

Is Brutus the real estate guy here? I wish Brutus still bounced around from job to job being employed by whatever makes the joke work.

Well, this for one. The other flaw is that you are bad at giving constructive criticism. "Hey, can you help me with this?" "What bonehead mess are you getting my company into?" "Well, that doesn't help my problem at all." "Neither does your brain!" "Okay. I'll talk to you later."

Wednesday Special

I've been listening to Dr. Demento's last show over the last couple of days and just finished it yesterday afternoon. It was a Top 40 most requested songs of the 55 year history of his show. With just a couple exceptions (I actually think the official tally was 3) I was able to recite all the songs I remember hearing when I was routinely listening to Dr. Demento back between 1996 and 2004.

I got into Dr. Demento when I decided to listen to the Dr. Demento 20th Anniversary Collection that my Mom had. I fell in love with it and needed more. Learning that his show aired out of Kansas City on KYYS Sundays at midnight, I began staying up late to listen. Dr. Demento is the reason I was bad at school. I stopped listening when I just couldn't stay awake anymore. His show had moved stations at least twice since I started listening and, based on someone else's research, left the Kansas City area in 2007. The radio show would come to an end in 2010. Dr. Demento began streaming in 2006 and has been online since. You can listen to thousands of episodes of his show on his website.

No one else I knew listened to the show. I could annoy my friends and anyone near me with dumb novelty songs. I'd quote odd, random things and could take credit for being so funny. I felt like I was a member of a secret club. I'd go back to Dr. Demento and novelty songs numerous times over the years. They were comforting. I got into so much more music because of Dr. Demento. Being a fan of Dr. Demento and novelty songs just reinforced the belief that I should've been born in 1909. I can't even count the ways Dr. Demento has inspired me.

Back in June, Dr. Demento, whose real name is Barry Hansen, announced he was retiring. Keep in mind, he's been doing this radio show for 55 years (since 1970) and is now 84-years-old. He has more than earned a retirement. I saw numerous comments online on how Dr. Demento got them into different music or wanting to do that kind of music. I'm glad Mr. Hansen is able to see and hear how much he means to so many people. Here's to long and happy retirement, Doctor. Thank you for being one of the best.

December 1, 1966

He did this 48 times (counting the one that made it) and probability states that at least 23 of those cigarettes should of made it. I guess it would be less since he couldn't just not caught any, swallowed and spit a few out, bit at the wrong time... Ok, so maybe missing 47 times is possible.

Don't do it Brutus. Doesn't seem worth it. Monetarily or what it's going to do to you later. Just get a burger or some soup and go back to work. You don't need to eat the diner shrimp.

And don't forget to stay demented!

Sleep Score Number: 23

Harry Anderson would've been 73 today. I posted my annual tribute to him back on Saturday where he plays Jim Korman, a comic book artist for Tales from the Crypt whose monsters start coming alive when he begins taking fertility pills. You can check out "Korman's Kalamity" here.

You can also check out all my Harry Anderson posts by clicking the tag.

November 30, 1966

Ha ha! Brutus didn't even forget his wife's name because Emily is beautiful (she is fairly normal and not a buxom beauty like you would expect) but because he's just a terrible husband!

Brutus has been having a lot of problems waking up in the morning. I don't know how to fix this. I hate waking up in the morning and only do it because I have to. I just wanted to comment that Brutus needs help. It's killing him.

Self-Identified Rebel

November 26, 1966

Don't apologize. It's clear the stairs aren't there so why would he walk out? You can probably put those back. He won't need them anymore. Or keep going, maybe run him over.

I'm just imagining Brutus here as President Trump, who also can't really use airplane stairs.

"Why are you like this, Brutus? What are you rebelling against?" "What do ya got?" Brutus snarls while smoking and wearing sunglasses.

I don't believe for a second that Brutus ever rebelled in his life. I mean, look at him. People who rebel don't look like that.

Do They Only Have the One Cellphone?

July 12, 1987

Meh. Just run some water into the pot from the sink. Is this really a "life hack" or whatever? Do people do this? I'd be afraid everything would just dump out from the already-open top. Are the bottoms of cans even conducive to being opened?

Is this condensed black bean soup or are they using canned black beans to make homemade black bean soup?

Just call the auto club--or Triple-A if you're nasty and don't care about trademarks and free promotion. All flats are bad and it doesn't look like there's a service station anywhere nearby. Is she in a desert? The vast farmland expanses of the Midwest?

The perspective in the last panel is way off compared to the first two panels with the car.

Yesterday's post was my annual Harry Anderson post featuring an episode of Tales from the Crypt he starred in back in 1990. A series of comic book monsters have been coming to life. Is it just a coincidence or it is because of an artist and his fertility pills?

If you would like to support me or this website, you can click the support link at the top of the page.

The Delicious Taste of Triangles

November 25, 1966

You have to pay. You already ate...and you ate so much! Brutus clearly went into this restaurant to stiff them. He deserves to wash dishes.

And if you're going to offer to pay by check, do act so suspicious. "Here...let me just pay you with...*stifles laugh* a check...heh heh..."

It's true. Science proved it. I don't like the way Wilberforce looks in these two panels. Get that look off your face and be glad we're feeding you. Rectangle, triangle, you're going to eat it and love it. Or next time, you can make your own damn sandwich.

Korman's Kalamity

Tales from the Crypt aired on HBO from June 10, 1989 to July 19, 1996. Based on the popular horror comic book series from EC that ran from 1950 until 1955, this was one of the last things William Gaines had a hand in, aside from publishing Mad before his death in 1992. Running for 93 episodes, Tales from the Crypt became a fairly popular series because, since it aired on HBO, a premium cable channel, it could actually show elements of horror along with swearing, graphic violence, sex, and nudity. In "Korman's Kalamity", Jim Korman, played by Harry Anderson, is a comic book artist whose art comes alive. "Korman's Kalamity" aired June 26, 1990 and was written by Terry Black and directed by Rowdy Herrington.

The episode opens with Jim working on Saturday to get a story finished for the magazine he works on: Tales from the Crypt. He's having problems drawing a corpse-eater. His wife, Mildred (Colleen Camp) bursts in and derides Jim for working on a Saturday, canoodling with secretaries (they are off today), and not taking his fertility pills so they can have a baby.

I love the costumes so far. Those are some fun shirts.

Anyway, Mildred is a ball-breaking shrew and even though Jim disappoints her at every turn since they got married, he is stuck with her. Defeated, Jim takes his pill even though he is worried about the side effects and believes the pills are messing with his brain.

Anderson clearly didn't draw in this episode. The comic book art
used throughout the series was done mostly by Mike Vosburg, although at
least one episode was illustrated by Shawn McManus.

Jim then goes back to work on the corpse-eater, which now seems to come to him easily. Cutting to a laundromat, a pretty lady (Cynthia Gibbs) is doing her laundry while Jim is finishing up his laundry. The two make eye contact but Jim heads out the door while the woman settles in to read while her laundry cleans.

While reading, the power in the laundromat goes out and a creepy guy comes in (Richard Schiff) saying that he shorted out the fuse box. Intending to rape and possibly kill this woman, she reveals that she's a police officer which doesn't impress him. Even being karate chopped and flipped over just makes him angrier. That's when a sudsy sea monster pops out of the washing machine, chews on the man's head for a bit and then just rips it off.

The police investigate but don't believe her story that a monster ripped the man's head off. I don't know how they think the head managed to be ripped off because I don't think she could do it. Look, you don't have to believe monster but how else could this happen? Also, are we ever going to give her a name?

While out on patrol, the officer comes across the most recent issue of Tales from the Crpyt which features a cover that looks very familiar to her.

Other covers she looks at also correspond to other weird sightings people are seeing across the city. She then decides to go see this "Jim Korman" who is apparently creating monsters that are roaming the city. Meanwhile, at the Tales from the Crypt office, Mildred calls Jim at work and begins henpecking him. Yes, he took his pill. No, he's not canoodling with the secretaries. Yes, I am working. He then begs her to give him a break. She threatens to break his neck when he gets home and hangs up on him.

Maybe he should go into hiding. There are places he can go that
can protect him.

After work, Jim gets in his car and finds that Officer Woman is in there, sitting in the backseat. That doesn't seem very police-y. They do recognize each other from the laundromat, which is good, because considering how fuzzy that scene was on YouTube, I could barely recognize them.

She couldn't just wait outside the car. Or come upstairs to the office?
And why isn't she in uniform anymore?

SHE HAS A NAME! Lorelai Phelps. She explains to Jim that monsters that have appeared on the covers of Tales from the Crypt have also appeared in reality and instead of thinking that Jim just has elaborate costumes and is himself the monsters, she believes his drawings are coming alive. Jim's skeptical, who wouldn't be, but Lorelai wants to do an experiment. They go back up to the office where Jim starts drawing a monster while Lorelai looks on. I'm sure Mildred would love this scenario. Anyway, Jim finishes the monster and it looks like this. Somewhere in the city, it's going to pop up.

No evidence of this monster is immediately apparent. Jim then hits on Lorelai, who backs away because he draws horrible monsters. Jim says he'll start doing romance books. Hmm. Mildred was right about him. He is a letch.

Jim, NO!!

Meanwhile, in a different part of the episode, a group of kids are playing war in a warehouse of some sort. One of the kids who was left behind, hears a noise from a refrigerator and noises coming from it. The kids can't get the door open, but the monster doesn't need any help. The monster scares off the kids and the monster starts stalking the streets. I assume. We never see this monster again.

Grandma?!

Back at the office, Jim is doodling romance scenes which disgusts his editor. His editor leaves and Jim receives a phone call from Lorelai. He suggests they meet for dinner at a nice, secluded restaurant just down the street. They were just thinking about each other. This spot has a nice view, good food, soft music, and as the camara pans around the artist desk...

SWEET VELVET FOG!! How'd she do that?!

Mildred goes downstairs to get a surprise for Jim while Jim, almost unconsciously, draws another monster that looks kind of like Mildred. When Mildred returns, her surprise is a gun. She then notices his latest monster looks like her and gets angrier. Jim tries to blame the pills when this happens.

"That's flattering, Jim. Is that how you picture me? As a rancid heap of garbage?

Mildred and the monster start fighting so Jim just walks out of the office, just as Lorelai shows up in a very revealing dress. Jim pushes her into the elevator as the monster gains the upper hand and, I guess slaughters Mildred.

He's gonna have to redraw this page.

Jim and Lorelai have a romantic date and the Cryptkeeper says they will live happily ever after which disgusts him. "Maybe Mildred should've been nicer to him and then she wouldn't have turned into such a monsterpiece!" Now, stayed tuned for Dream On, it's the breast show on TV!

Every episode of Tales from the Crypt was adapted from an issue of the EC horror library. This episode was originally presented in Tales from the Crypt #31 (Aug-Sep 1952) as "Kamen's Kalamity" by Bill Gaines, Al Feldstein, Jack Kamen, Graham Ingels, Johnny Craig, and Jack Davis. In the comic, Gaines and Feldstein hire Kamen whose art is too sweet. Kamen doses off at his table and dreams of committing murder before returning home to his wife and children. He then wakes up at home... Clearly, the name was changed from Jack Kamen to Jim Korman, although Harry Anderson would play a Professor Kamen in the Christian movie A Matter of Faith.

You can watch the full episode here. Harry Anderson would be 73 on October 14.