Wednesday, January 17, 2018

-25 In February 1899

The coldest winter day that I remember was back in 19Dickety6. We had to say "Dickety" because President Clinton had lost our word "ninety" to Saddam Hussein. We'd get it back in 19Dickety8. Anyway, the day started out normal, it was just a little cloudy and I was walking uphill to school with my beet necklace--we all had beet necklaces, that being the style at the time. By the time I got to school, it had started raining and the temperature really dropped. Suddenly, the rain started turning to ice. I noticed this when my friend, Grover, asked me for a couple of bees. That's what we called quarters back then because they had pictures of bees on them. "Give me four bees for a dollar" you'd say.

Where was I? Oh, yeah. Soon everything was covered in ice and it had started snowing. At about 40 to the owl's head--which was what we called 12 o'clock on account of the owl's head in that location, back then, clocks had pictures of birds on them. "I'll meet you at the bowling alley at a quarter past a cardinal" you'd say.--the principal came over the intercom and said we could go home because there was two inches of ice underneath three inches of snow. I bundled up, making sure my beet necklace was over my coat because you didn't want to be caught without it, and began the treacherous uphill climb back home.