Are They Just Playing With One Ship?

 

October 24, 1967

I remember when children would fight in the vacant lot or somewhere private out of the eyes of adults because they didn't want to get in trouble. Now it has to be in the middle of everything with everybody watching with their phones out.

Anyway, the boy that's not Wilberforce is gonna get beaned by that fence post.

It's Battleship, Gladys! It's clearly Battleship! Do you not know what Battleship looks like? Do you not know how Battleship works? I just...I can't...Gah!

What?

I love the two info dump panels

August 21, 1988

Yup. We could see this coming from about three panels away. Brutus was going to be hit by something. It was just a question of where and by what.

I'm not positive but I think this is the first Sunday strip without Wilberforce's curls. Wilberforce was last seen in the May 8, 1988 Sunday strip and he had his curls. I wonder if his normal haircut debuted in a Sunday strip or daily strip.

I'd take a sundial for my yard. I want my grandma's old birdbath. My aunt currently has it because at the time, she was the only one that had a house. There is also a water pump at an abandoned house I want.

The sundial will be able to be used an average of 166 days a year. I don't know if that's worth it and it doesn't take into consideration partly sunny days. There's not even half a year of sunny days in Cleveland. I fear Brutus once again has wasted his money.

 

 

 

 

 

 

The second chapter of Vagabond Girl posted back on Thursday. Go check it out. I plan on posting a chapter on Mondays and Thursdays through October to see if there is any interest. If you would like to support me or this website, you can buy me a cup of coffee here.

Up, Up, and Away

September 12, 1967

Mm. Mother Gargle was always a horrid bitch. Good to know. I don't know why this argument requires waterboarding Brutus, but the 1960s were a different time.

Clark Kent is a well-respected international journalist and author who is married to a well-respected Pulitzer Prize winning international journalist and author. Being Superman is quite literally the least remarkable part of Clark Kent. Even without the punchline, comparing Brutus to Clark Kent doesn't make sense.

Candy Boy

August 11, 1967

How come parents of a certain generation absolutely hate teaching their children things? Is it because they don't know the answer and it makes them upset or are they just jerks? Explaining gravity is one of the easiest things to tell people, right? It's right up there with "Why is the sky blue?". Right?

Chocolate's expensive. It's getting rarer, right? Because of the chaos and destruction of the rain forest in South America? It's also why coffee is getting more expensive if you use South American beans. But enough about money and global instability, is Brutus a Left Twix person or a Right Twix person?

Slippin' and Slidin'

August 9, 1967

While the height of the Cold War was mostly over by the time this comic strip saw print, worry over the Soviet Union and Communism still persisted in the United States. Many did think that "it can't happen here" either because the United States was so much stronger or believing where they live to be too unimportant to bomb. 

Can Harry see Wilberforce lighting that M-80? If so, then he should do a better job at warning Brutus.

Well, go make more. I don't even know how this happened. She barely moved the tray and all of them just go tumbling onto the floor?

Do you not get a side with the sliders? Some fries or a salad...well, maybe not a salad...but something.

"You're Looking Rundown." "Thanks...?"

August 4, 1967

Wilberforce has to go home at some point. You can hit him when he returns cold and hungry.

I will admit that I like the surreal Looney Tunes-esque stuff Art sometimes does. How did he do that?

Ha ha! It's funny because Brutus has sleep apnea and is slowly dying! Of course Brutus has sleep apnea. Gladys probably has it, too. And Mother Gargle. It's an epidemic.

Brutus Came First, Brutus Should Be the Eldest Child

May 15, 1988

Who's on first? Just keep your car for 3000 more dollars! Or lease a car, I don't know how that works but I've heard about it! I'm surprised Ace Motor Sales waited until the last panel to hang up on Brutus. I would've been done at panel 2 or 3.

Here's Mother Gargle not helping again. To be fair, lots of people have raised children, it's not some huge accomplish. The worst people in the world have raised children or have been child-rearing adjacent. How about we wait a few years to see how Wilberforce will turn out?

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It's "Like Mom Used to Make" Not "Like Your Mom Used to Make"

From 2016. Harry Anderson's final acting role. A Matter of Faith is one of those Christian movies that I think is slightly better than others but let's be honest who the audience for this movie is: Christians and die-hard fans of Harry Anderson.

July 20, 1967

Does Wilberforce have a collection of used oil filters or did Wilberforce just go into the garage and Brutus needs to dispose of his used oil filters? Either way, I feel the blame rests with the parents.

Isn't it kind of hard to ruin meatloaf? Eh, whatever. I wouldn't really want to eat anything from this diner anyway.

She's Just Doing That In Public!

One thing I like to do is research all the ghost towns that are in Kansas. Most of them barely become anything more than just a name on a piece of paper. Some actually turn into a location that barely stretches further than someone's house. Fewer become actual towns that remain on maps. One of those so-called "paper towns" was Wyoming, Kansas in Calhoun County, now northern Shawnee County.

An advertisement appeared in 1857 in newspapers and Wyoming even appeared on a couple of maps, but by the time Kansas became a state, it was gone. From 2018, Wyoming, Kansas. Oh, also Brutus hands in a subpar report so it's just another--what day did this go up?--Friday for Brutus.

July 14, 1967

Wilberforce eats soap. Well, that's a good piece of the puzzle. Especially since he's burping up bubbles while arguing he didn't eat the soap?

It's only been a couple months and Art has no idea what to do with Teeny.

I barely even use the chip card anymore because it's so spotty in if it will work or not. Anymore I just tap the card or use my phone/watch. I certainly will not hand my card to the cashier so they can dance around with it. Maybe that's just me...

Summer of Hurricane (Hattie)

July 10, 1967

Is this something Wilberforce eats every morning? If so, then fine. Whatever. If he tries out different concoctions every morning, then I get it. I don't think mayonnaise, mustard, ketchup, and maple syrup pairs well with corn flakes.

It always weirds me out that a good portion of school districts run the school year roughly from Labor Day to early- to mid-June. My school year runs roughly mid-August to Memorial Day. School used to start after Labor Day because of farming, now i think it's because of the heat.

I'd plan things to do with Wilberforce and Hattie. Hattie would be the daughter I never had. But that's just me, I guess.

Sink or Swim

During the War of 1812, the British burned down the White House, the U.S. Capitol, and the Washington Navy Yard. The British occupied D.C. for a little more than one day. Reconstruction began fairly quickly with President Monroe moving in 1817, although work wasn't completed.

When John Quincy Adams became president in 1825, he and his wife, Louisa, moved into the partially rebuilt White House. It still had scorch marks, still in the process of being rebuilt, and Louisa never really considered it a home. Also, because of the controversy upon how Adams was elected, the administration wasn't that popular with the general public. There was a slight recession going on at the time and the Adams' were chided for "living in opulence' while common Americans were suffering. To combat this, Louisa held a public exhibition of the White House which further angered the public. Flash forward to today where there is a huge recession going on and it is becoming more difficult for Americans to live their lives, President Trump is demanding a $400 million ballroom, has covered much of the White House in gold accents, and seemingly has more plans up his sleeve like turning the simple ionic columns to ornate Corinthian columns. Do all of these goes against what the White House means. The White House is purposely simple and not ordained with elegance and luxury because the House doesn't belong to the president who occupies the White House, but to the people. The fact that President Trump is focusing his attention on showboating (Venezuela, Iran, Cuba) and renovating the White House when there is homelessness and people starving in the United States shows how out of touch (or ignorant) he is.

July 7, 1967

I honestly can't think of any word that would elicit this type of reaction from me. And this is in a newspaper in the 1960s. The word could be 'damn' for all we know.

Get your lips off of Veeblefester's cheeks and remove your nose from his ass, Brutus.

I understand what "raise all boats" means, but it's still a weird saying.

This Report Is Good

It's clear that Trump is building a bunker so when he inevitably has to leave in 2029, we will be unable to get to him. He claims the ballroom is for security, but that only makes sense if Trump never leaves the White House. Is that what he plans on doing? If the 2028 election is between JD Vance and Kamala Harris (for example) and Harris wins, will Trump just barricade himself in the ballroom and drone-attack and snipe anyone that comes to carry him out? And if Vance wins, is Trump just going to live in the White House with him? No other president has needed a massive ballroom or an underground impenetrable bunker, but this president needs one?

Also, let's not forget that groceries are up about 30% and gas is hovering in the low- to mid-$4 range, not to mention prices going up due to tariffs and everything just being more expensive. President Trump is building a ballroom so he can receive bribes from corporate oligarchs and then cower in fear when the people have had enough, but we have to tighten our belts and just...wait. "This is peanuts. I appreciate everybody putting up with it for a little while. But I don't even think about it." "[I] don't think about Americans financial situation."

To be honest, Trump has said he'll barely be able to use the ballroom because it's scheduled to be finished in late 2028, but I don't think he'll be able to use it at all. He'll be dead by 2029, either naturally or other means.

And now...comics.

June 28, 1967

Probably because Brutus drops every ball they throw at him or he misses and the ball flies by him. It ruins the fun when you constantly have to pause and wait for someone to chase the ball.

This is how imagine Butch Kapinski looks. But I know Butch is probably a chubby kid with a buzzcut and, probably, a dick nose.

I expect an 8- or 9-year-old to repeat words when writing. I think you need to come down off your high horse, Brutus. And what is Wilberforce doing a report on? Is all the information in his head because he has no books or even a computer near him.

I refuse to acknowledge the 'thesaurus' comment.

Tuesday Quickies

June 21, 1967

Huh. Veeblefester is bad at aiming ketchup.

Zap?

Maybe Hattie just has more important things she'd rather do. Has her parents ever thought of that?

Understood

May 29, 1967

What's wrong? It's a suction cup arrow. It's not like it's a real arrow and Teeny's boyfriend is now dead.

Is this all Teeny does? Make out with boys and yell "WILBERFORCE!"? I guess that explains why she hasn't been seen in nearly 50 years.

Nothing going on here. I got a text message today that just read "Come early tomorrow". It's clearly an attempt at a spam text because I don't know this person and the area code is for 406, which is the entire state of Montana. I don't live in or know anybody in Montana, let alone know someone who can demand(?) that I come in early tomorrow. I want to respond, but I don't need other spammers and scammers knowing my phone number works.

The Thornapples All Live In a Yellow Submarine Apparently

May 11, 1967

Does only Wilberforce know the names of his friends? Harry, Leroy are actual names "Weakeyes" and "Noodle-Nose" aren't even nicknames, they're just insults.

And who is who?!

Does...Does Brutus really believe this about himself? Brutus would be the first to admit that he is none of these things. "I can talk bad about myself, but you can't! You don't have that right!!"

Happiness = $$$

May 2, 1967

I don't understand why children can never get their own water. Is it because they should be in bed and not wandering around the house? I think Wilberforce is old enough to get his own water. It's not like he's in a crib, he sleeps in a bed.

Nice heart pajamas, Brutus.

What is going on with Wilberforce this week?! Is money all he thinks about? Is this some kind of brain damage? What I really hate are the dumb idioms. "Easy Street", "Money talks", "Is money the key to happiness". I'm glad it's Saturday so this, I guess I'll call it a storyline, is done.

What Did He Expect?

April 20, 1967

I like Sally. I sometimes wish I had a troublesome neighbor girl who bothered me. Kind of like Dennis the Menace, but more in the vein of today's Hurricane Hattie. Maybe Elmo from Blondie. I don't want them to vandalize my property, I just want them say and do funny things around me and consider me a safe person to talk to.

Did someone else write 'disappoint'? Or at least the 'oint' part?

I am officially going to be working at a historic site in my city for the foreseeable future. So I guess my day wasn't disappointing. Hopefully I will be greeting guests at our 1870 mansion for years to come.

20% Less Sucky

March 22, 1967

How did Jonny's sister get in the mailbox. I imagine Jonny helped push her in. This tends to happen with brothers and sisters. Or so I'm told.

Leave it to Brutus to use A.I. and it actually helps and isn't just a big pile of steamy shit. As much as I'm disappointed that Veeblefester is using A.I., I'm not surprised. Veeblefester would happily replace all the employees he has to pay a salary and benefits to for one computer program with a yearly subscription.

I guess now is a good time to mention that I hate A.I. and don't use it. A.I. can't do what I do. I tried. It gave the Thornapples a cat.

Enoff Stroganoff

March 1, 1967

Where are they? Are they outside or has the imagery of The Veldt started to leak out of the nursery?

I believe this version of Wilberforce is quiet and scholarly, but is also your general child terrorist. Wilberforce wouldn't become his current version until after Art would pass away. Yes, Wilberforce would become neutered.

I never kept frogs as pets like all the other boys did, supposedly (too gross), but I did have a turtle for a short time. Does that count? Was I real little boy?

I looked up some beefless stroganoff recipes and now want to vomit. I'm not a stroganoff person, with or without beef. I know I've have decent stroganoff, but my go-to opinion on it is always "It's bad".

At least Wilberforce gets to eat today.

Hard At Work

February 8, 1967

Ha ha ha! Brutus' boss is actively trying to kill him! And he's trying to leave evidence of it being an accident by having his nephew Brucie do it! Ha ha! It's funny!

"Heh heh, isn't there a target you could hang up that he could practice on? Oh...the spot right between my eyes is the target. Great. Heh heh..."

I don't know about you, but when I have an off day at work, I always take time out of the day to talk to my boss about how I'm sucking at my job. They love it and it's always good to show I'm self-aware.

Don't forget about this year's Christmas comic Little Gabe and the Golden Stars.🎄