Rose Is a Rose

July 6, 1967

I don't think you are going to need that much string to fly a kite. How does this even happen? I say cut the loose string and the spool off, tie them together, and just leave Brutus where he is. He's the parks department's problem now.

Charlie Brown had been flying kites (and being bad at it) for about 15 years now so it was already a classic trope.

I absolutely don't care about all the work my neighbors do for their yard. I have to mow and trim back invasive vines which is already too much work. If you're side-eyeing me for doing the bare minimum for my yard, then the problem lies with you.

That's My Boy Who Said That!

July 5, 1967

There's an episode of I Love Lucy where Lucy and Ethel learn to play golf so they can spend more time with their husbands. But instead of learning from a pro, they have Fred and Ricky teach them. Anyway, Ricky and Fred make up a bunch rules and one of them, as a penalty, your ball gets stomped into the ground (mashie!). That's what Veeblefester is doing here--playing by I Love Lucy rules.

What a lovely day, yeah we won the war. May have lost a million men, but we got a million more...

I think Chip drew Brutus' head and then slammed the panel down because the mark for the lower ear seems obtrusive and unnecessary. I keep thinking I have a spot on my screen.

Dream Life

April 24, 1988

Wastrel's caught up in the legal system again. Here's hoping the court believes him about the Miracle At Lourdes. It's not like Wastrel is on easy street, he seems really bad at money.

Is that a little girl on the jury or is it Bring Your Daughter to Jury Duty Day?

I don't talk in my sleep. My Mom talked in her sleep a couple of times. "Does Veronica have flowers in her yard?" I have no idea who Veronica is.

Pink is definitely a choice for the lighting in this bedroom. Is it the light from an alarm clock?

School's out so I'm (barely) working over the next couple of months. If you would like to support me or this website, you can throw some money at the About page or click the 'tip' button.

Back In Black

Did they agree that Brutus shouldn't be wearing black sweaters? I mean, he normally looks like an amorphous blob anyway, but that black sweater is not doing him any favors. He also looks like a piece of licorice.

*relieved exhale* Chip knows that 'dumb' has a 'b'.

July 3, 1967

I think Veeblefester is allowing too much from Agnes. She must be part of a really good union or, honestly, she'd just use Veeblefester's hatred of Irish shanties as proof of discrimination.

Soupposting

July 1, 1967

Is the reverend here between services and spending his downtime harassing parishioners who decided to sleep in? This definitely isn't making me want to go to church, now give me my newspaper.

A well-known secret of a lot of restaurants is that whatever is the special is what they got cheap or what's about to go bad. Not this place. They open fresh cans bright and early in the morning and leave the giant pot of soup to simmer on the stove all day.

That's a Good Zoom Out

June 30, 1967

I have already commented on this post and I really don't have anything more to add.

Those dandelions look pretty good. Big and healthy.

I love when people are like "I could never be [job with a lot of education/skill]." "I could never be a horticulturist." I don't think anyone is going to be asking you. Barely keeping house plants alive is a little different from what horticulturists do. Me: *badly cuts a sandwich in half* "I could never be a surgeon." No, for lots of different reasons!

Just Showing Up At the Doctors...

June 29, 1967

WHAT'S GLADYS GOING TO DO TO BRUTUS' LEATHER CHAIR?!!!?!!!

Is anybody else suddenly physically ill?

Look at the smile on the doctor's face. He doesn't like dealing with old people, but they sure are cash cows!

This Report Is Good

It's clear that Trump is building a bunker so when he inevitably has to leave in 2029, we will be unable to get to him. He claims the ballroom is for security, but that only makes sense if Trump never leaves the White House. Is that what he plans on doing? If the 2028 election is between JD Vance and Kamala Harris (for example) and Harris wins, will Trump just barricade himself in the ballroom and drone-attack and snipe anyone that comes to carry him out? And if Vance wins, is Trump just going to live in the White House with him? No other president has needed a massive ballroom or an underground impenetrable bunker, but this president needs one?

Also, let's not forget that groceries are up about 30% and gas is hovering in the low- to mid-$4 range, not to mention prices going up due to tariffs and everything just being more expensive. President Trump is building a ballroom so he can receive bribes from corporate oligarchs and then cower in fear when the people have had enough, but we have to tighten our belts and just...wait. "This is peanuts. I appreciate everybody putting up with it for a little while. But I don't even think about it." "[I] don't think about Americans financial situation."

To be honest, Trump has said he'll barely be able to use the ballroom because it's scheduled to be finished in late 2028, but I don't think he'll be able to use it at all. He'll be dead by 2029, either naturally or other means.

And now...comics.

June 28, 1967

Probably because Brutus drops every ball they throw at him or he misses and the ball flies by him. It ruins the fun when you constantly have to pause and wait for someone to chase the ball.

This is how imagine Butch Kapinski looks. But I know Butch is probably a chubby kid with a buzzcut and, probably, a dick nose.

I expect an 8- or 9-year-old to repeat words when writing. I think you need to come down off your high horse, Brutus. And what is Wilberforce doing a report on? Is all the information in his head because he has no books or even a computer near him.

I refuse to acknowledge the 'thesaurus' comment.

Another Monday

June 27, 1967

I love that Brutus sliced off a piece of ham from a whole bone-in ham hock to make his sandwich. Hopefully that subconscious angel puts the ham away. It'd be a shame for it to go to waste.

Sometimes you just know it's going to be a bad day.

The Best Advice

It's been a busy weekend. Yesterday, the third installment of Dusty Chaps went up, and I did a quick look on social media at an old edition of Robinson Crusoe we have on display at the store. Go check those out and if you would like to support me or this website, you can throw some money at the About page.

April 17, 1988

"Skinny Skooby" is a terrible name for a diet supplement, especially one that I'm assuming is supposed to be like SlimFast. It should be called something like "ChocoDiet" or "DrinkWeight". "Skinny Skooby" sounds more like something in 2009 than 1988.

Hey, Padre, stop haranguing the children. I know that Reverend has a name, I don't think I've actually seen it in print yet.

Based on my limited knowledge of Uncle Ted, he doesn't seem like a "born loser" like Brutus. If anything, he's just a normal man going through life the best he knows how. So, I guess it makes sense that Brutus goes to him for advice.

This also makes me question if being a "born loser" is hereditary. I always figured Uncle Ted was Brutus' father's brother so does the "born loser" trait come from the mother's side? Or is calling yourself a "born loser" just abdicating responsibility for why you are a terrible human being?