That couch looks very uncomfortable

March 24, 1967

I wish someone would send me a coffin through the mail. Honestly, I wouldn't be concerned. It's clearly a leg lamp--a prestigious award. You can tell because of the Italian fra-gi-le written on it.

"It's a gift from Uncle Ed!" Uh-oh. It's Aunt Myrtle.

What is Gladys saying about you? Is it just "Brutus went to work today. He really doesn't like his job but he's been doing it for 20 years and makes good money so it'd be stupid to try to find something else, right?" or is it "Brutus is such a loser. He calls himself a born loser but sometimes I think he wants to lose because of some weird psychological need. He's seeing a therapist but we all know that isn't going to help." The first scenario isn't bad. But that second scenario...

Dr. Brutus "Doogie" Thornapple, Psy.D

Right back at you, dick.

February 25, 1967

Yes, clearly you are either making up reasons to go to therapy or the perfection of your childhood has blemished your adulthood which is making you unhappy. But I'm no therapist, unlike Brutus(?!).

"So I must be talking to Brutus Thornapple because if you weren't Brutus Thornapple you would just say 'You have the wrong number'. Anyway, I want to make an appointment for a therapy session. That's something you are able to do, I guess."

Classic TV

July 27, 1966

Man finally goes to therapy and he gets yelled at by the therapist. Luckily, there are plenty of things out there Thornapple can hate and make his entire personality, much to the detriment of his friends, family, country, and soul.

I, and my wife, watch old shows all the time. Seinfeld, Golden Girls, Murder, She Wrote, Unsolved Mysteries, Matlock, The Office, IT Crowd, Schitt's Creek, and several others. You've seen the state of the world lately? Just let me enjoy 30 minutes in Mayberry before I head off to my 32nd Trump protest.

Nyah x 6

May 7, 1966

Case history? Thornapple has a file? And apparently he's some sort of sexual deviant.

I don't care if you are a literal child in grade school, six "Nyah"s seems excessive and makes your argument weaker. Although why Brutus chose to argue with a nine-year-old girl is beyond me. Especially a nine-year-old like Hurricane Hattie.

She's His Only Friend

January 10, 1966

Looks like proto-Brutus will be looking for a new therapist. Or just stop going. He'll start bottling up his feeling and emotions. What's the worst that could happen?

Wilberforce has been standing there all day waiting for Brutus for mention the quiche Gladys has been making.

Post-Holiday Mental Breakdown

May 18, 1965

Locked in the basement? And he'll stay there?! Possible child abuse and how this type of punishment--leaving a child alone in a locked room with his thoughts--aside, is there a reason you can't just send him to his room?

Alice seems concerned at least.

I've already commented on this strip and I barely wanted to that time. I'm not going to do it again. I can't. I won't.

Chip Gets Paid By the Panel

July 17, 1974

Ooo...k.

I don't know why we want to try to fix this instead of trying to monetize it. Sure, it might be dangerous but until then, think of the cash!

I completely agree with Gladys. You still need a place to live and a way to get to work--although I guess you do normally use the bus. How much money was he saving? Clearly enough for a mortgage payment, which in Ohio is, on average, about $900.

I am really bothered by what Brutus is saying being split between two panels. Really. Bothered.

No-Confidence Wednesday

June 17, 1974

Does Brutus always hide in the file cabinet or does he just hide there when someone is collecting money for something?

Poochy Dressendorfer doesn't sound like the kind of guy whose marriage will last so I wouldn't want to give money either.

Everyone cheats. Everyone steals. The world's going to Hell!

I am all for therapy, but I don't think it's really working for Brutus.

You At Least Have Some Water

November 9, 1973

G'yeesh! Apparently the therapist is being played by a Gahan Wilson character!

If the first thing your therapist does is criticize the way you are sitting, laying down, whatever, then you need to find a better therapist. They aren't there to help you with that but with all the other, more important problems in your life.

Was Brutus trying to do a bit? What is he doing? And of course Hattie said 'both.' Hattie is a very optimistic girl with a pessimistic attitude, much like many of the children today.

#Schulz100

Today would've been Charles Schulz's 100th birthday. The creator of Peanuts sadly passed away back in 2000 but his characters and inspiration live on today through the comic strips and television specials. There probably isn't a cartoonist alive that wasn't inspired by Schulz and the 92 comics that are celebrating his birth is testament to that. You can read all of the comics over at the Schulz Museum but here are a few of my favorites and a couple that didn't make the tribute page.

Agnes

Animal Crackers

Back In the Day

Broom Hilda

Curtis

Dark Side of the Horse

Diamond Lil

Dick Tracy

Drabble

For Better or For Worse

Garfield

Heathcliff

Mutts

Sally Forth

The Born Loser

Mirror, Mirror

February 5, 1974

Does Gladys routinely sneak out of bed and pick Brutus' pocket? At least the Gladys of today just outright spends money instead of acquiring it through duplicitous means.

Oh. So this is how Brutus dies--the alternate dimension of himself that lives in the mirror. Hope he never looks at the mirror during a flash of lightening.

The Holidaze

Look, I don't want to get all continuity-y on you but Brutus, from what we've been told, only has two living older relatives. Uncle Ted and his mother-in-law, Ramona Gargle. Everyone else related to Brutus lives in his house. Who drove him crazy? He should be used to Mother Gargle and he likes Uncle Ted. Also, Brutus still had to work. He probably only got Christmas Eve/Day and New Year's Eve/Day off if that so he had at least 8 family-free hours away.

And we know Brutus didn't kill them making this a pseudo-confession because we've seen, at least, Gladys since the holidays.

That Couch Looks Uncomfortable

🎵It's no surprise to me I am my own worst enemy
Cause every now and then I kick the living shit out of me🎶
Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk
I didn't mean to call you that🎵

Charlie Brown says all the time that people don't like him. While that's not true, Charlie Brown has plenty of friends and acquaintances, we feel bad for him because he's just a kid. Kids should be friends with each other until they hit puberty and turn into a bunch of bastards. Brutus is an adult--yeah, maybe nobody does like you. What does it matter? Get over it, ya chump.

Hey, if you are in the area of eastern Kansas this weekend, come out to Baldwin City where the Maple Leaf Festival is being held. Maple Leaf is a the largest arts and craft festival in the area and has been happening every year since the 1950s. I'll be hanging out there Saturday.

The Fault In Our Veeblefester

In what world would a normal human being chose those shades of green for the furniture? I get that maybe you are trying to differentiate from the dark colored suits but you couldn't pick a soft maroon or tan or something? I know it's the job of the daily syndication colorist to just color these as quickly as possible but still, someone colored that furniture green, looked at and went "Yeah, that's some fine work. Next!"

But the Watercooler

Wait a minute. If you click on the 'watercooler' tag in the posts, there are literally dozens of examples of people at work talking to Brutus. Dozens!

Mediocrity

Brutus either got a new therapist or he shaved his little beard. Also, isn't "delusions of mediocrity" just considered life? I've been reading and commenting on this strip for more than ten years and Brutus has never showed signs of "delusions of mediocrity". Brutus is well aware of his limitations and shortcomings. He's not deluded at all.

If you or someone you know is in distress or struggling, please call the National Suicide Prevention hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or visit suicidepreventionlifeline.org. 

Facebore

I rarely post things on Facebook. When I would post something, no matter what it was, friends would get into arguments with me. I am no longer friends with those people but I just don't want to deal with the hassle. So I could be considered the perfect Facebook friend. I don't post anything and I don't comment anything but I could see how, if you didn't like that, you might unfriend me.

Feeling Inferior Would Actually Explain a Lot

It's said that those with an inferiority complex mask their inferiority with a "superiority complex", basically trying or acting better than everybody else to compensate for being, what they think, inferior. This would fit in well with Veeblefester considering he keeps bags of money around his office so that all his employees can see and just considers himself much, much better than anyone who he works with.

Some therapists believe, though, that superiority and inferiority complexes cannot exist together since someone with a superiority complex legitimately believes they are better than other people. People with inferiority complexes, like Veeblefester here, may show off how they rich or extravagant they are in order to hide their inferiority. People with superiority complex have no need to show off wealth or extravagance because they already believe they are better than others.

Whatever psychobabble you believe, I find it strange that Veeblefester is paying someone just to talk about how great he is. Captive audience, I guess. His employees get to go home at 5, this guy is stuck with him for 50 minutes then it's off to the country club.

1288: Oh Good, Everyone Is In Therapy

Wait. Do you mean to tell me that even the great and powerful Veeblefester can't even rely on his money to keep him happy? I've never tried it but I heard that wearing underwear made out of pennies feels really good. Or maybe I'm just making that up and hoping that it's true. Either way, worth a shot.

1179: It's About Time Brutus See His Therapist Again

You may have seen this flag and phrase around usually on big, loud trucks whose exhaust system may not be 100% up to code. I'm torn because I am for honoring your ancestors and, for better or worse, being a part of the Confederacy or serving in the Confederate military is considered part of your heritage but only if one of your ancestors served. Down in the South, this makes sense as there is the chance your distant relative served for the Confederacy. But are you really flying the Confederate flag because you want to honor your great-great-grandfather or because society generally agrees that the flag is racist?

I live in Kansas and I see people flying the Confederate flag. Kansas was never part of the Confederacy nor would the people who fought and died to keep Kansas from allowing slavery be okay with you flying that flag. It also occurs to me that the people who fly this flag would never, ever, ever fly flags of other countries where their ancestors immigrated from. My ancestors came to Connecticut from Britain, migrated to North Carolina and Tennessee before ultimately winding up in the Little Dixie area of Missouri. Due to those last three places, there is a huge possibility that distant relatives of mine fought for the Confederacy and owned slaves so I think I could get away with flying the Confederate flag.

But I won't because why would I fly another country's flag? If you're not willing to fly the British flag which is more than likely where your ancestors came from, then why fly the Confederate flag? Also, if you have to explain why your flag isn't considered hate speech then maybe you need to get a new icon for your heritage.

Currently everybody who knows Brutus hates him so the odds don't seem to be in his favor.