Leave 'Em

I'm always very disappointed when places serve peas as a vegetable. I went to a restaurant where their choice of veggie was carrots or peas and I was, like "Why don't you just spit in my mouth?" I got carrots.

Time Man #1

“Take him dead or alive men!” the lieutenant shouted and the other officers began charging into the apartment building.

On the sixth floor, Butch Matson was cowering in a corner with a gun watching the door to the apartment he was in. “I didn’t do it!” he shouted. “I didn’t do it,” he said softly and put the muzzle of the gun underneath his jaw. He closed his eyes and waited for the police to burst in. He heard the feet on the stairs , quick movements outside the door and the splintering of wood and the door swinging open against the wall then he heard silence. He slowly opened his eyes and saw the police standing still--frozen.

Time Man stood just off to the side in his blue and yellow uniform. “Come on. Get up. I’ll get you out of here.”

Butch got up and Time Man grabbed him and they went out the window. As soon as they were away from the building, Time Man restored time. “You saved my life.”

“Police shouldn’t be acting like that.” Time Man said.

“Especially toward an innocent person,” Butch said. “They think that I killed that old landlord and his family but I didn’t. Neither did Melissa Stasi, the woman in jail for the murder.”

“Who is the murderer?”

“Julia Stack, she’s a singer at the club that’s in the building the landlord owned. He was going to raise the rent so the club was going to close. She was just made headliner--the club closing would mean her having to start all over. She killed the landlord and framed Melissa and me.”

“I’m going to drop you off at the Golden City Herald,” Time Man said. “Gail Porter is a reporter there. Tell her everything. I’m going to find Ms. Stack.”

“She is probably at the HiLow Club rehearsing,” Butch said as Time Man landed on a narrow balcony at the Golden City Herald building.

He softly tapped on the window and Gail Porter opened the blinds. “Time Man, what are you doing?” she asked as she opened the window to let them in.

“This is Butch Matson. He has some information on the Melissa Stasi murder. I’m gonna go check it out but I thought you’d be good at writing the story,” Time Man said.

“What? Sure. Well, Mr. Matson, let me grab my notebook,” Gail ran to her desk.

Time Man flew back out to the HiLow Club. When he went in, it was nearly empty. There was a drunk at the bar and the bartender and a couple wait staff milling about. “Time Man?” the bartender asked, seeing the brightly dressed, caped man in the club.

“Julia Stack? Is she here?”

“In the back, probably her dressing room. Through the stage back there,” the bartender pointed.

Time Man went behind the stage and found a dressing room with Julia Stack’s on the door. He tried the door but it was locked. He knocked lightly and heard a shuffling behind the door. The door unlocked and a woman opened the door. “Julia Stack?”

“Yes. What’s the meaning of this?”

“You’re the one that killed that landlord and you framed two innocent people.”

“Mm. I don’t know how you found out but let’s talk about this,” Julia said.

“I spoke with Butch Matson,” Time Man said. “He told me everything and he’s telling a reporter and the police now.”

“And you just believed him?” Julia laughed.

“Why would he lie? He has nothing to lose and nothing to gain. But you…” Time Man lightly shrugged and pointed. “You have everything to lose.”

“I should’ve known I couldn’t get away with this,” Julia said. She suddenly pulled a gun out from behind her and pointed it at Time Man. “I know I can’t kill you but I make sure I go out on my terms.”

Julia pointed the gun at her temple. Time Man quickly went for his wrist sundial. Time slowed and stopped making it possible for Time Man to walk over and take the gun from her hand. He restored time and she realized that she no longer had the gun.

“Come on, the police are here,” Time Man said, hearing the faint sounds of police sirens. The two of them left the club. Police were waiting along with Gail and Butch. “Here’s Julia Stack. She’ll confess, Officer,” Time Man said.

“Thanks, Time Man,” the officer said and cuffed Julia.

“Thanks, Time Man,” Butch said again.

“No problem, Butch,” Time Man smiled.

“Time Man,” another officer ran up to the three of them. “We have a report of a robot robbed a bank a few blocks from here.”

Time Man and Gail looked at each other. “You want to come with?”

“A robot robbing a bank? Of course I want to see this,” Gail said.

Time Man picked up Gail and they flew the few blocks to the bank reported to be robbed. Time Man landed and he and Gail carefully went into the bank. A robot was robbing the bank. It had smashed through a wall and ripped the vault open and was currently tearing through the money although it looked like it was just doing mindless destruction. Time Man walked over and threw a punch at the robot. The robot easily took the punch and backhanded Time Man as hard as it could causing Time Man to fly across the bank and through a wall. Time Man came back in and barreled his way back to the robot.

“Gonna have to use a bit more strength to stop this thing,” he said before slamming into the robot sending both of them through a counter and into an office. The robot grabbed Time Man by the throat and threw him back across the bank, through a couple of pillars and into a wall. “Everyone needs to get out. This building isn’t going to last much longer,” Time Man snarled as he stood back up.

The few people in the bank and Gail left the bank. Police had arrived and were keeping a perimeter around the bank. The robot easily took the next several punches that Time Man threw at it. “You can’t stop me, Time Man,” the robot suddenly spoke. “I may be in jail now but my presence in this city and your life will always be there.”

“Lucius,” Time Man whispered, recognizing the voice.

The floor above them collapsed and within seconds, the rest of the bank building fell to the ground. The rubble was silent and unmoving for several minutes. As time went on, people carefully got closer, worried about Time Man and if the robot was stopped. The robot came shooting through the bricks and metal and wood holding Time Man’s tattered cape, cackling. He took off into the sky and disappeared.

A few seconds later, Time Man clawed his way out of the destruction. “Time Man,” Gail exclaimed and ran to him. “Are you okay?”

He coughed. “Yeah, I think I’ll be fine. That robot was a threat from Lucius Goebel,” Time Man said.

“But he’s in jail,” Gail said.

“I know but it was his voice coming from that robot. He may be in jail but he’s still going to find a way to control this city,” Time Man said.




The robot landed on a rooftop docking bay at Genesee Labs. The robot walked down to one of the labs and handed the tattered cape to Conrad. “So Time Man isn’t as strong as we all thought he was,” he said quizzically. “Now, all we need is to know who he is and he should be easily defeated.” Conrad shook out the cape and brought it with him into another room.

Petula Isn't Even Her Real Name

I originally thought that Petula was a name Chip came up with by hacking the "nt" off the word "petulant". Turns out several people are named Petula including famed British singer Petula Clark who was the first person to record the song "Downtown".

Knowing this is a real name and not just a tweaking to make a bad word and name (Rancid, Lividia, Wastrel) means the pronunciation changes from pet-choo-luh to puh-too-luh in case anyone cared.

When It Rains, It Pours Pennies from Heaven

The saying "When it rains, it pours" is usually meant to mean something bad--the fact that Brutus and Wilberforce are seemingly happy here makes me think they wanted it to snow. The only definition I found that included good things was the Urban Dictionary and no where did I see that this saying could be relevant to actual weather because rain can fall at any speed.

I've heard people use "when it rains, it pours" to mean good things but none of the definitions take it that way. It is interesting to learn that Chip uses Urban Dictionary on a regular basis though.

"I Think I've Got Myself On the Phone!"

It was someone spoofing you, Brutus. Now they know someone will pick up that phone when it rings and now you are going to spammed and phished out the bunghole. You should just unplug that phone, turn off the ringer, or something because that number is now useless to you and everyone who has it for it the next ten years.

Hattie Quinn

There are many possible origins for the Batman villain The Joker--the most known one is that The Joker was originally a failed comedian who took to a life of crime as The Red Hood. While being persued by Batman, the Hood falls into a vat of acid which disfigures him. There are holes in Joker's origin so future writers can add their own spin to the origin but I'm sure no writer would've come up with The Joker just putting on whatever lipstick Hattie is wearing here and then robbing a bank after murdering his next door neighbor.

Never Order Food With Market Prices

Is it me or does anyone else want to punch this waiter in the face? I usually tip pretty well even when you do a bad job but this is one server where under tip I'd write: "Stop looking and acting like a douche" and then give him the low 10% tip instead of 12-15% like I usually do.

Tauy Creek Digest #41: Blakely Court

In the summer of 1922, a new development was planned in western Topeka. On land donated to the city by Franklin Monroe Washburn, the development was going to be called Washburn Park and cover the area between MacVicar and Oakley and 10th and Munson. The land had been in the Washburn family since 1857 when Jabez Avery Washburn settled there with a land grant signed by President James Buchanan. A park in the northwestern corner of the neighborhood, on either side of Ward Creek, was created. On either side of the park were going to be two new streets, both named after World War I heroes from Topeka who died in France during the Great War. The first was Louis Philip Billard, born to a prominent Topeka family in 1891. Billard was an early advocate of aviation and was one of the earliest pilots in Kansas. In 1916, he enlisted as a test pilot and died when his plane disintegrated on July 24, 1918.

The other was Victor Blakely. Victor Kenney Dodge Blakely was born in 1897 to Charles Graham and Mattie Victory Kenney Blakely. Charles Blakely was a prominent insurer in Topeka. Victor attended Topeka High School where he played football, attended Washburn College, and was one of the first Topekans to enlist in the military when the United States entered World War I. Over his time in the army, Blakely was promoted to lieutenant and led the 4th Platoon, A Company during the Meuse-Argonne Offensive, the last major battle of World War I that lasted from September 26 until the war ended on November 11th of 1918. His battalion suffered heavy losses during the second phase of the Offensive and he died October 15, 1918. Lt. Blakely was buried in the Meuse-Argonne American Cemetery in France although a cenotaph rests in Mount Hope Cemetery in the Blakely family plot back home in Topeka.

Topeka and the local developers promoted the Washburn Park neighborhood extensively throughout 1922 and 1923. Washburn Park was bordered by 10th Street on the north; Webster, 11th, and Franklin (now Collins), and Blakely on the east; Munson on the south; and Oakley and Billard on the west. Ward Creek divides the park in half and the land is covered in large older trees. Blakely Court was a short one block curved street that went from Munson at the intersection with Warren Avenue to about halfway through Collins Avenue. Based on maps, it appears that Blakely was never opened to traffic. The Sanborn Fire Maps of 1944 label Blakely as "not open" and a 1950 topographic map has Blakely labeled an un-maintained dirt road.

After the Flood of 1951, flood prevention measures were installed all over Topeka including the levees along the Kansas River, the Shunganunga Creek, and Ward Creek. Ward Creek was rerouted slightly, the sides were built higher to control flooding, and Blakely Court--whatever form it was in--was demolished and by 1955, it was no longer included on maps. Today, houses sit where Blakely Court would've connected to Munson and Collins. You can almost see where the road might have been based on the location of the trees but all evidence of it is gone.

City map of Topeka, Kansas, 1938 showing Blakely Court.

Brutus' Gut Does Look Bigger Today

Just change the way you eat. Go outside and walk around the block. You have a dog--take Kewpie out for walks. Standing around the watercooler at work isn't helping anything either--but at least you are on your feet. Go walk around the building or the parking lot. Don't just wallow about it.

And That Sly Smile

Look at Veeblefester in that last panel. He totally gets off on acting like this. Giving us those angry bedroom eyes. WEIRDO!!