It's Easy When That's All You Eat

Well, you have to include things like the bun, condiments, stuff like that and honestly, some people are built that way. They eat one piece of pie and suddenly they're part of Lio's See the Whales tour.

Ants Marching

Hope everyone had a good Fourth of July. I know mine was pretty decent. And tomorrow I leave for Chicago. I just wish I could skip over today and go to Wednesday but then who would clean my house before I leave?

I've been there before. Not the restaurant Veeblefester is talking about but where it takes so long waiting for the check or for your change that you get hungry again. Of course that could just be because I am a fat pig....

#236: Sleep Well, and stay where I put you

I finished reading Graveminder by Melissa Marr which I wanted to read because of the cover. The cover really grabbed me and aside from a problem I described early on, it was a decent book. The plot of the book is the town of Claysville made a deal with who they thought was the Devil to not get sick. In return, people have to die so others can live and if the dead people are not minded, they come back to live to feast on the living so I guess they become zombies, or something similar.

The minding part is what the book is really about. Rebekkah Barrow is called back to Claysville after her step-grandmother, Maylene, is found dead. Rebekkah remembers that Maylene used to take her to the town's cemeteries, sprinkle some sort of liquid over the graves and say a "prayer": "Sleep well, and stay where I put you". You would think that would be a decent enough plot. A woman thrown into something she doesn't want to do and doesn't really know what to do trying to track down dead people wandering around the town. Sounds kind of intriguing but that's where the intriguing part ends.

Melissa Marr is known more for her Wicked Lovely series of books aimed toward the Twilight audience. Marr's first mistake, in my opinion, is the convoluted backstory the two main characters. While it was interesting at first, it became all those two characters talked about for chapters. Even when they were starting to make love (at least they made love in my mind). The next mistake was taking too damn long to catch the one dead person roaming the streets. I won't give away details but I don't know why it took as long as it did except that without the chase the book would've only been about 220 pages.

It was a decent story but it wasn't executed like it should've been. Instead of being a horror/thriller novel like one would think, Graveminder ended up being bogged by silly relationship banter that more deservedly belong in the Wicked Lovely series.

Ack! A Person of Color

Hey, do my devoted readers remember that I have a Twitter? You should go and follow me. Sometimes I say funny things but most of the time I'm an idiot and/or jerk. Should be great fun.

Speaking of Twitter, I announced over there that for Thursday Comics for the month of September I am going to post my five favorite issues of DC Comics' Action Comics which will be undergoing a relaunch during that time. I figure I should do something to honor DC ruining Action's run to 1,000 issues. Sadly, the issues will mainly focus on the post-Crisis continuum as I have very few pre-Crisis issues. More specifically 1987-2000. Hope you will join me.

I will be spending the Fourth of July in a park chowing down on awesome food from local restaurants and watching the fireworks over the Kansas River. Why isn't Gladys at the Fourth of July parade? Why does Gladys hate America?

Nothing Says America Like Golf

My wife and I were watching the Music Choice stations we have with our cable package and I began wondering why some frontmen feel the need to go solo or even create new bands. Going solo aggravates me more especially if the music the person makes is similar to the music the band was making (I'm looking at you, Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20). Jack White confuses the hell out of me. I like Jack White (but not the White Stripes) but why do you need to form two bands and associate yourself with about a dozen more and have a solo career? I then hate it when the frontman goes off to do solo work then returns to the band to make a horribly crappy album and uses that as an excuse to break up the band. Again, looking at you Rob Thomas from Matchbox 20.

Ugh. I do not like the new layout for the Sunday strips. It leaves too much space on the sides and makes the post way too long format-wise. I'm sure it wasn't Chip's decision to move to this format and he's not one to complain because complaining just eats into his own time when he could be golfing.

Where O Where Has My Brutus Gone?

How hard could it be to find Brutus? Clearly he is in the front or back yard (possibly a small, nearby park or desert) but Gladys apparently checked his chair in front of the TV and the toilet then considered him lost forever.

R.I.P. United Media

A month or so ago the comic strip world was perplexed when United Feature Syndicate turned over distribution of its comics and columns to Universal Uclick (Universal Press Syndicate). So far, it has worked well. Nearly every comic strip is on one sight and anyone's disposal. However, it was announced today that United Feature Syndicate has shut its doors. Founded in 1897 as a rival to the Associated Press, United Feature has ended its reign. There are now only two major syndicates Universal and King Features. Smaller syndicate include Creators, Washington Post Writer's Group and Tribune Media. Here is more information on United Features' closure.

The Born Loser was once syndicated by Newspaper Enterprise Association, a division of United Features but like all other UFS/NEA strips moved over to Universal on June 1, 2011.

Unlike the Lockhorns who clearly drink and make fools of themselves, Brutus tends to make a fool of himself whenever the opportunity arises. I'm wondering what Brutus did. Anything less than sexually harassing the minister's wife is unacceptable.

Madame Claire Voyant

I had several dreams last night which harkened me back to the good ol' days of my late teens where I had good friends and a really good job. It's really sad that a job I had ten years ago is still considered the best job I've ever had. Second best if "stay-at-home dad/freelance blogger" counts as a job despite not getting paid.

I had a friend who went to a psychic when she was 17 or something like that and the psychic said that she would a young mother. She would have her first child at age 20 so I don't know what to consider that. I guess anything under 21 would be "young" but I don't know. Hopefully this fortune teller won't tell Brutus he will be a young mother.

The Shari Lewis Wonder Book

There are a lot of people who are taken from us too soon. Shari Lewis, quite possibly the best ventriloquist to grace the television, was one of those people. Shari Lewis won first place for her puppetry on Arthur Godfrey's Talent Scouts in 1952 and in 1953 she made her TV debut  on a local program called Fun N Facts. After bouncing around from kids' show to kids' show, Lewis began her first network television series The Shari Lewis Show in 1960, the show would last until 1963 and help make Lamb Chop, Charlie Horse and Hush Puppy household names. Lewis would go on to create Lamb Chop's Play-Along for PBS in 1992 and Charlie Horse Music Pizza in 1998. Lamp Chop's Play-Along would last until 1997 and Music Pizza would end shortly after its debut when Lewis would pass away due to complications from uterine cancer on August 2, 1998.

I don't have any comic books featuring Lamb Chop or Shari Lewis and I don't know if any exist but I do have an old book from 1961 published by Wonder Books. I don't why it's advertised but the cover is washable. You can learn more about Lamb Chop and Shari Lewis' daughter Mallory at lambchop.tv.

The Shari Lewis Wonder Book
Story by Crosby Newell
Pictures by Ruth Wood
Lamb Chop and Charlie Horse created by Shari Lewis.
Published by Wonder Books
Copyright (C) 1961 Shari Lewis. All rights reserved.

But Food Tastes So Good

 

 My best friend had to go to the doctor the other day because of chest pains. He's my age but apparently he has that disease Robin Williams had in "Jack". Anyway, the doctor hooked him up to an EKG and found nothing wrong with his heart but hinted that he should cut back on crappy foods and pop. I'm sure after my friend ate his egg and cheese Kobe burger and drank two big glasses of Pepsi, he took that advice to heart.