You'll Never Catch Mother Gargle Pop Some Tags

August 10, 1966

I hope this guy is sitting in the old buzzard's office. He originally just used the office to fart in and then one day, just never left. Except to get that picture of the boss off the big printer.

Does Mother Gargle hate everything? Isn't that tiring? She clearly doesn't like thrifting unless it leads to an insult of her son-in-law.

Mathing

June 15, 1966

Did Thornapple not see that gigantic sign hanging up next the entrance? Maybe he always walks around with his eyes closed so he doesn't see advertisements. I also find it odd they don't have signs inside the store.

I don't know if anyone else in education has this issue, but it's kind of difficult to explain to students that when you add or multiply you can transpose the numbers (34+63=97, 63+34=97, 9x8=72, 8x9=72) but you can't do that with subtraction or division (12-4=8, 4-12=-8, 49÷7=7, 7÷49=0.14...) so Hattie is already ahead of those kids.

Brutus Could Barely See the Parade Anyway

June 8, 1966

I'm going to assume that the joke for this strip is that he's an officer and has long forgotten what a lowly sailor likes or would want.

"Oh, Gob!"? Is this guy's name 'Gob'? As in, George Oscar Bluth as portrayed by Will Arnett in the cult favorite TV show Arrested Development? Does this lady know him or is Gob some sort of military codename?

July 4, 2011

Calm down. It's just a parade. Why can't Wilberforce just scoot past those four people?

When I first commented on this strip, I pointed out the person of color in the "crowd". That man would become Arnie, a beloved character who not only works with Brutus but also lives next door. Wait. Do all Veeblefester employees live in some sort of compound or enclave?

Car Trouble

June 3, 1966

Betty, you gotta keep your eyes on Bamm-Bamm. Yes, he's the strongest baby in the world, but the world can be a dark and scary place.

Grocery stores still have loose pieces of vegetables that you can buy. You can use one of those hard-to-open plastic bags, but no one's making you. Just through that lettuce and celery in the cart without care. However, I never see loose loaves of bread.

1989

Gladys, if you're not going to help then get out and I will just push, steer, and stop on my own.

I think I could pull Gladys' hat off.

Slab Crab

February 14, 2025

Sorry I was gone all week. I caused you to miss this lovely comic featuring Brutus and Gladys' last Valentine's as a married couple.

October 5, 1986

Who is this frog? Prince Andrew? How about you find a woman over the age of consent, and not, you know, a 9-year-old?

And this isn't going to be a One Froggy Evening situation. If that frog prince doesn't sing, Hattie will just play frog baseball with him or just throw him against a wall.

I mean, if Todd Sweeney has the best meat then paying his exorbitant prices is fine. I'm willing to pay a little more for fresh cut slabs of the best beef this side of the Ohio River from Todd Sweeney, the demon butcher of Fleet Street.

I posted a link on social media yesterday, but for those who may have missed it, Timmy and the Robot posted yesterday. If you would like to support me or this website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

He's Fine

March 14, 1966

Remember kids, never do anything nice for no one!

Are there any stores that still honor some random number with free stuff or a trip? Maybe local stores do but clearly your local Kroger isn't. $100 of free groceries? She'll be able to buy three dozen eggs!

I love the tiny carts and that she dropped the one thing she was purchasing.

Now she's dressed like it's freezing cold outside.

I don't believe the doctor phrased it like that at all. He has a cold. Why'd you even take him to the doctor for a cold?

And what's with Wilberforce's hands in the last panel?

The Gift of Nothing

July 4, 1986

I'm impressed that one lifeguard can lift and carry Brutus. But enough fat-shaming. Maybe the lifeguard is trying to keep Brutus from going out too far thus making saving him more difficult. Brutus doesn't strike me as the best swimmer.

Nothing is what I would get her. Call me crazy, but I don't buy presents for people who call me "a loaf of shit". I mean, what even is that. And I am just assuming Mother Gargle has called Brutus this. Off-panel, of course.

If you would like to support me or this website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

Black Fun-Day

Gladys enjoys elbowing people with impunity and raining blows onto old women who think they are entitled to that last set of matching pajamas. Gladys does strike me as someone who enjoys violence.

I'm going to get my Black Friday done in one trip. I'm not going home and then going back "into the fray". If I go home, I'm staying there.

Thursday Quickies

December 16, 1965

Hey! More death in this comic strip!

Skipper and Smee? We're mixing pop culture references now.

July 25, 2024

Hmm. Someone watched that Christmas episode of The Office where Dwight is selling Princess Unicorn dolls, the hottest toys of the season, and says "Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-ka-ching!"

Maybe don't watch the Olympics tonight, Brutus. They're clearly depressing you.

It's Suspicious Activity on a Canceled Credit Card, It's Not the End of the World, Arnie

December 15, 1965

THEN WRITE A LETTER AND MAIL IT TO SOMEONE WHO CARES!! THIS WINDOW IS FOR COMPLAINTS SO IF YOU'RE NOT GOING TO COMPLAIN THEN GET THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!

Surely, you saw this suit before buying it. You saw the long-ass sleeve, uneven button placement, and pants leg and said "I think this'll work."

July 24, 2024

Ok. Sure. I'll work 12 hour days. Do I get 4 days off? That's the only way I'd work 12 hours a day. Also, I need at least a $75,000 a year salary.

"Are they going to send you a new one?" What kind of question is that? I'd ask what was purchased that was suspicious? A bunch of calling cards from Mexico? Yeah, that's suspicious. A very specific OnlyFans model subscription? Maybe not so suspicious.

Party People

December 24, 1989

There is one version of The Twelve Days of Christmas where it's a June apple tree and not a pear tree. It's likely due to a mishearing of "partridge in a pear tree" and hearing "part of a juniper / June apple tree". Anyway, it's pretty impressive that there is still an apple on that tree in December.

I'm sure those dots are indicating that the bird is dumb, but I like to imagine that he's drunk. The little guy needed some Christmas spirit before listening to this song for the 47th time this season.

Brutus doesn't seem to remember that they are having a party. Couldn't the joke be "Yes, that's the idea. I don't people who come over to notice I haven't dusted!"? Adding a party to this comic is an unnecessary detail.

Who would come to this party? Arnie and his wife. Maybe that blond guy from work and whatever poor young girl he's currently dating. Maybe--MAYBE--Hurricane Hattie's parents. Sounds boring, and we're not even guaranteed a scene like this from Brutus.

It's almost summer which means I won't be getting paid. If you would like to support me or this website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

This Is Abuse

October 6, 1965

Atomic fallout?! I guess that explain the oddly placed ⚛⚛ in the first panel. It took me a couple read-throughs to notice the "atomic fallout" comment. This strip clearly takes place in a timeline where Russia launched their nukes. The obiliteration of two global superpowers can't stop love.

Two things: I appreciate the spelling of "Emilie", and I want to see more of Quincy Madison.

Why is that one on top already open? Did she need to use a tissue in the car or something? I also feel Gladys should be buying those at CostCo or Sam's Club. Buying them separately like that seems pricey.

Oh, cool. They're comparing notes now. Why is this a competition? What's to gain from this? Being married isn't a scorecard or whatever. God, I absolutely hate this trope and wish it would die already.

Did they put the cream and sugar directly into the coffee pot?

They Have a Framed Picture of Kewpie!! a;slkdjfljfkldsjkfsd;fkld

September 28, 1965

Let this be a reminder: Never be kind.

I'll admit, I react like this guy in the last panel at least a dozen times a day.

If they schedule a day every year to angrily stare at each other, why can't they have a truce on all the other days? Honestly, I don't understand how Gladys hasn't taken Wilberforce and run off, creating new identities and starting a new life away from Brutus and Mother Gargle.

Apple Dapple

Take a look at the clothes and comics from Gladys Parker. She would work on Gay and Her Gals, Flapper Fanny, and create her own long-running strip, Mopsy. You can check out this post from 2022 here.

August 25, 1965

Well, now everyone is looking at him because he's drawing attention to himself. Stop that. If you don't want to be perceived, don't do anything that draws eyes toward you like talking at a normal volume or loudly playing a game on your phone, you dumb middle schoolers!

I love gala apples. Which is very shocking for me to say since I am not a fan of apples.

I am also not a fan of how some of the apples change color between panels. The abused intern who colored today's strip was clearly dozing off on this one.

Is That a Loose Cucumber In There?

Wyoming was a town hopeful along the Shawnee (Calhoun) and Jefferson County line in Kansas. Appearing on one map in 1857, lots were advertised but the endeavor was abandoned within a few years.

July 16, 1965

I'm starting to think that The Born Loser is a terrible title for this comic strip. Maybe Foibles and Follies, or That's Life or maybe They'll Do It Every Time...wait, not that. There's nothing really loser-y about what's happening in any of these strips. Just strip after strip of how life screws all of us eventually.

I do love whenever cartoonists need to draw someone buying too much at the store, it's always normal things that you would actually need. I mean, this cart looks like it has some ketchup (or catsup), strawberry milk, a head of lettuce, a loaf of bread, a (A!!) stick of butter, some salt, and two frozen pizzas. There's not really much junk food in there like you would really buy if you went hungry.

Maybe when the Thornapples want junk food, they guzzle down some ketchup. I don't know.

Return of the Fruitcake

March 6, 1989

I originally thought that Brutus fell asleep and the toast popping up startled him, but then I noticed the bite taken out of the toast.

Why doesn't the electrical cord connect to the toaster? What a weird illustration choice.

The fruitcake gets a mention again. I looked up how long fruitcake lasts and it lasts six months to one year. Six months to one year. It's like a Twinkie. Or a carefully preserved McDonald's hamburger.

Black Friday '23

October 19, 1977

Let's be honest, Hattie's mom probably "lost" her so she could have a few minutes alone. Or, Hattie "lost" herself so she could get free ice cream. Hattie's not worried. She'll be fine. She'll survive.

None of us ever had to deal with bumper-to-bumper traffic, full parking lots, shoulder-to-shoulder crowds, or battles for sales items. We did it to ourselves. We played ourselves and capitalism won.

Gladys misses elbowing other people in the face. I mean, she could just elbow people in the face whenever. The way the world is going, I wouldn't be surprised.

Big Dinner? It's 4, Maybe 5 People

October 5, 1977

What does losing weight have to do with going to England? Because food portions are smaller? Because England is more walkable? Because you went to the ruins of castle and the stairs to the tower collapsed, trapping you without food for four days?

Yes, sir! It's great that we're doing this the Wednesday--Wednesday?!!--before Thanksgiving. This is the best idea we've had in a long time. Perfect. No notes.

Sagacious Sunday

April 13, 1986

What's wrong with this guy? He works at a grocery store but doesn't know what thyme is? Does he also pronounce it as 'th-ime'?

Just find the seasoning and spice aisle, Brutus. You don't need to talk to people to find those.

I bet Art really chuckled at himself when he came up with this.

It took until late November but Brutus is finally trotting out a word from his word-a-day calendar he got last Christmas.

"You just suppose so?" With those bedroom eyes? Not anymore!

Saturday Quickies

August 4, 1977

Not from some guy on the street. You're a terrible salesman! I'll take three.

Why are you buying from the meat counter? You can just take a few steps to the left and buy a pound of ground round for about $2-3 cheaper.