Can I Get Peanuts and Crackerjack At a Football Game?

October 18, 1966

This insurance agent looks like he might die soon. But he probably has insurance.

Brutus dies within the next week. It's clearly murder. "I wonder who did it," the police ask. "Brutus was loudly threatened with death by an insurance salesman last week." "Hmm. I guess this case will remain...unsolved."

Someone could probably rewrite "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" to fit football. We should also play "Baby Elephant Walk" at football games more. Creating or rewriting songs to be about football is probably cheaper than paying for the rights to actual songs.

Needs Improvement

September 6, 1966

Shouldn't that be "Daddio" or something? I don't even really know what's going on here. Are they in a music shop? A studio? His hair isn't even that long. God, these generational arguments are so idiotic.

But the important thing is that you still have a job. Your incompetence is clearly something Veeblefester needs and believes your idiocy is worth every penny. It probably helps boost office morale.

Veeblefester Is Always Harsh

May 24, 1966

BUG MUSIC!!?!! Well, it is the sixties. Sadly, Dobie Portacio will not be at the level of such acts like The Beatles, Simon & Garfunkle, the Rolling Stones, or Jan and Dean, but maybe he'll still be a more local celebrity. (probably not)

I can also catch just as many flies with one of those things with sugary water where they can go in but can't come out. Which reminds me, I need to contact the Department of Labor and see if I can start sealing the doors closed during work hours. Surely we're over that shirtwaist claptrap by now.

I apologize for not posting yesterday's classic comic and bringing up this classic image in comparison.

I'm a Rocker

March 31, 1966

I'm sorry Ugly-Yet-Polite Woman, Brutus only has eyes for the three lovely ladies who would never want him.

No, that's mean. These women could be fond of personality and be fine dating a slightly more unattractive man. Except Jennifer, the one wearing the cloak. She wants handsome and she wants money.

I bet Chip was very proud of this when he thought of it/saw someone say it online.

Raspberries were a band from Cleveland so they probably hold a special place in Chip's heart during their five years (1970-1975) of existence.

It's weird seeing Uncle Ted's hair kind of from the front.

Moldy WOLDI Oldie

March 16, 1966

Who's this kid hiding from? Is this a "Home Alone"-type situation or a Rosalyn situation or are his parents trying to punish him? Eh. Whatever is going on, I hope he gets strangled.

It's fine. It's 1966.

I don't know. I think if an older loved one of mine just sat down at a table to listen to the radio, I'd suggest maybe seeing a doctor. "It's okay, Brutus. You just listen to the radio..." Gladys says sadly.

WOLD (102.5 FM) is a real classic rock station out of Marion, Virginia. WOLDI makes no sense as radio stations aren't given five letters. I get what Chip is doing but he should have stopped with WOLD.

Dare to Dream

December 14, 1965

The best thing about these old comic strip is that I have to look up some of the references. Pablo Casals was a cellist and apparently a really good one. You can hear some of his stuff online. He was awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom by John Kennedy,

I enjoy that the kid is banging his head against the wall.

July 23, 2024

How can he be happy when Mother Gargle is visiting. I'm just assuming she's still here because the suitcase she brought yesterday was pretty big.

Latex? That sounds uncomfortable. I guess you're not laying on the latex, you should have a fitted sheet. You do have a fitted sheet, thank God!

So I guess Uncle Ted is looking for an adjustable mattress? Should be easy enough to do. Wipe that look off your face and get to selling!

Dreams-R-Us is a terrible name. I'm not a fan.

Tuesday Quickies

November 30, 1965

Who's Princie? Another kid? A dog? It's not like you are moving at a high rate of speed, just open the door and lean out.

Gladys couldn't just leave the mail in the box outside their house? Maybe it needs a stamp.

Brutus is in the doghouse and he didn't even do anything. Even whatever is in his mug is scared.

🌈✨Wholesome✨🌈

November 27, 1965

Heh. That'll shut her up.

I don't see her holding cards, so she doesn't even get to play? She just has to sit there in a smoke-filled room watching these men play some low-stake games of poker? At least they aren't making her serve them food or something.

Is she able to leave the room?

Is the concert playing on the radio or are they just putting on whatever music they feel like? Do people just say one day "Want to go to a random concert tonight?" I never have.

Hope everyone has a good weekend.

Salad and Water...Again

November 9, 1965

Is there something funnier about being bad at playing the saxophone? Is it because of I Love Lucy? Is it just funnier because it's a squawky, annoying musical instrument when played poorly? That woman on the right is not having any of this. She is seething at looking at that saxophone.

You could put some ham or grilled chicken in that salad. I'd even take a couple hard-boiled eggs. Oh, well. I guess I'll just be hungry when it's time to go to bed.

2022.

Sit Back and Relax

October 28, 1965

Please don't do this. There are plenty of other ways to murder your husband that don't involve endangering other people and first responders. Don't want to burn half the state down.

It's nice that the assisted living facility let Uncle Ted keep his recliner. They're gonna have to shut that singing down though.

Party People

December 24, 1989

There is one version of The Twelve Days of Christmas where it's a June apple tree and not a pear tree. It's likely due to a mishearing of "partridge in a pear tree" and hearing "part of a juniper / June apple tree". Anyway, it's pretty impressive that there is still an apple on that tree in December.

I'm sure those dots are indicating that the bird is dumb, but I like to imagine that he's drunk. The little guy needed some Christmas spirit before listening to this song for the 47th time this season.

Brutus doesn't seem to remember that they are having a party. Couldn't the joke be "Yes, that's the idea. I don't people who come over to notice I haven't dusted!"? Adding a party to this comic is an unnecessary detail.

Who would come to this party? Arnie and his wife. Maybe that blond guy from work and whatever poor young girl he's currently dating. Maybe--MAYBE--Hurricane Hattie's parents. Sounds boring, and we're not even guaranteed a scene like this from Brutus.

It's almost summer which means I won't be getting paid. If you would like to support me or this website, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

Number 2

October 1, 1965

You may know "Ah, Sweet Mystery of Life" (not to be confused with the Roald Dahl collection of stories titled the same thing) by its opening lines. Check out this beatitude memory pop:

This is from the 1935 film version of Naughty Marietta, based on the 1910 operetta of the same name. Marietta is deemed "naughty" because she refuses to get married.

Okay, so if this makeshift raft can hold two people and tuba then that door could've held Rose and Jack.

Of course you didn't get the job, Brutus. You weren't qualified. Why would you get a job that you weren't qualified for? Wait. That happens all the time. My mistake, I'll leave you alone.

At least Brutus got a participation ribbon. I barely get an email sometimes.

Height Hate

September 16, 1965

I listened to three Schubert sonatas and symphonies and don't understand this. Is it because as it seems to fade out, it kicks back up to an ecstatic flourish? Maybe this comic, about a composer who died in 1828, landed better with 1965 audiences.

Jimmy Buffett died back in September! It took Chip almost eight months to do a tribute?! Might as well do nothing at this point.

I don't know why Brutus is telling Veeblefester that he's leaving. Just leave. He doesn't need to know.

Is that hair even a centimeter? Are you five nine and eleven centimeters and that little hair puts you into five-ten category? Whatever. You won't be worrying about your height when that blood work comes back.

Hope Veeblefester Doesn't Get Any Ideas

July 14, 1965

I do like how Art attempts to do something different. It'd be nice to see comic artist do different things these days but those newspaper comic panels are printed so small now, that drawing 20 pairs of footprints would be hard to understand.

I sincerely hope the menial task Brutus and Arnie are working on is putting the files in reverse alphabetical order. Meanwhile, "Hail to the Chief" drones on in the background.

Seeing What This 'Cool Math Games' Is All About

May 29, 1965

I was going to say that I'd prefer someone serenade me with beautifully played trumpet music but clearly he is not good at it so I guess I'll just stick with a boombox--that won't be mainstream until the mid- to late 1970s.

He actually took time to light a candle? A candle? Hey, guy, when you get to work in the morning, tell Bob Cratchit 'hi'.

He's too young to have it now but when Wilberforce is old enough to have social media, let me know his handle. I have some cyberbullying to do.

Looking up stuff for homework is fun? Don't they have a family computer Wilberforce could use? Don't tell me his excitement over this doesn't warrant cyberbullying.

I Don't Care About the Born Loser Timeline--Brutus Still Went to College In the 50s.

May 3, 1977

Brutus said he had a yeast infection. I get that you could maybe get in to see a doctor easier back in 1977 but Gladys couldn't push her bridge club back a couple of hours?

With the rise of satellite radio and streaming services, I've been hearing songs I've grown up with as muzak for years. And don't get me started on commercials.

The problem with newspaper comics is that they all sooner or later rely on Pluggers humor.

Mondays Amirite?

November 20, 1976

It'd be really great if Americana wasn't so rooted in slavery and racism. For some reason, in the original lyrics, 500 Black people are electrocuted while on a boat and apparently this song is sung through the eyes of a Black man trying to find a lost love. Why? Why did Stephen Foster think that was a good idea? And don't give me that "Well, it was 1848" excuse. That only works so many times.

I know I've complained before about us living in a 24/7/365 global economy but a majority of work still operates on a 9 to 5 schedule. Why can't Brutus sell tea cozies in the afternoon? What's the benefit of selling tea cozies in the morning? And why can't he sell tea cozies from home?

Wilberforce and Butch Kapinski should just kiss already

Wow. Sounds like a really shitty car dealership, Brutus. I'd go somewhere else.

I like when hold music is actually good. Puts me in a better mood to talk to you especially since if I am calling customer service, something has gone horribly wrong in my life.

What? Why? Is that in the employee handbook? Why is it a fine? It's not like he's burning popcorn or microwaving fish.

As a character, we know very little about this guy except that he works with Brutus. But I'm pretty sure we all just assumed, just based on looks and our few interactions with him, that he was a terrible husband. Lo and behold...

Technically, I think Wilberforce looks like a combination of Gladys and the coworker from the previous strip.

Also, I want to point out that it's weird for young boys to be talking about looks unless it's in an insulting way ("You and your big forehead-looking ass!") and Brutus shouldn't be so excited because your worth isn't defined by what two nine-year-old boys think of you.

I absolutely love this. I love that Brutus put on his apron and chef's hat. I love Brutus and Wilberforce standing at the grill watching the book go up in flames. I love the book being on fire. I can just imagine tonight at dinner, Gladys asks: "Was that book a great help in making a healthier meal?" And Brutus responds with pink meat juice dribbling down his chin, "The book was a very important part of the process."

"Your mother should be glad we even have a guest room that is actually made up to be a guest room! I could've turned it into a mancave. It could be a room to house all your BTS merch. Maybe a game room for Wilberforce. But I agreed to a guest room even though I hate having friends and family spend the night!"

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Thursday Quickies

August 30, 1975

And now we're onto the stand-up bass? How is Brutus affording these instruments? They aren't cheap.

Mother Gargle turned 70 back in 2017 so by now she would be 72. Definitely not 60.

Monkey Pee All Over You

August 29, 1974

Ooh, that's certainly a song. I'm listening to the Slim Whitman version. And it really is true that everything old is new again as "Indian Love Call" has seen a brief resurgence lately as it's in the current Wes Anderson movie Asteroid City.

Brutus has apparently moved on from bagpipes to the violin, which is a more reasonable instrument.

You would think Brutus would know how to do his job by now. You would also think that he would know how to handle the Acme account since he's been working on it, off and on, for the last 15 or so years.