H-E-Double Hockey Sticks

December 14, 1986

Does Veeblefester not have a sitting room that Brutus could sit in until Veeblefester is ready for company? I mean, I guess Veeblefester doesn't even have a covered front porch so why would he have a sitting room?

Is that a harp in the background of the fifth panel?

That's not what Brutus said at all, Wilberforce. Three periods, an intermission between each period. He even explained it's not halftime. It's the first thing he said!

Learning they are called 'intermissions' hurts more than learning a soccer field is called a 'pitch'.

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Hockey

...Who...is...Wilberforce talking...to...? Too many hits with that stick or the puck or something. Wilberforce--and likely Chip--seem to be a Pittsburgh Penguins fan. I do like that logo although I'm a New Jersey Devils fan, if I were to ever root for a major league ice hockey team anyway. What's funny is that Chip made the penguin friendly than the penguin actually is in the logo.

1132: Wilberforce v. Gladys

For some reason, it seems as if TV writers, movie writers, really any writer, are under the impression that kids go to school at 9 or something. How many things show kids getting up at 6 and being able to eat a large breakfast, take a shower, finish homework, walk the dog and take their time getting dressed all before school starts? In reality, kids have about as much time to eat something small and throw on clothes then head out the door. Maybe if you have good time management you could cram all that in but you know Wilberforce doesn't have good time management skills so of course he's having a good day, he's only been up for ten minutes.

Wilberforce is really poking at Gladys. Maybe he's doing some research for Pope Francis on how hard you can spank a child before they start to lose their dignity.

I'm More of a Cribbage Guy...Cribbage Is a Sport, Right?

I read the entire Wikipedia article on hockey and I still don't have any idea what Wilberforce is talking about in this strip.

Keeping Out of the Penalty Box

So is Wilberforce just running around in a parking lot shooting a ping pong ball into a net?  Also, who is he practicing all this with?  He doesn't hang out with anyone else but Hattie?

I was supposed to post an entry for the DCR today but I looked through all the comics that we get and only found two worth commenting on so I will carry those comics until next week and hopefully next week there will be a massive post that all can enjoy.

Also, a group of people are trying to save an old bridge northeast of Ottawa, Kansas.  The bridge, known as the Tauy Creek Bridge, was built in 1895 and placed on the National Register of Historic Places in 1990.  It was recently abandoned by Franklin County and passed into nearby landowners possession.  The group wants to either preserve the bridge where it is and turn it into a pedestrian bridge or move it to a park in nearby Ottawa for use as a pedestrian bridge.  As I get more information about saving the bridge I will let you know what you can do to help save this piece of history.

The Pros Get Paid Millions

Panel One

Wilberforce rings a doorbell with his hockey stick and he looks pretty pleased about it.  I'm glad Chip chose this image instead of the original of Wilberforce ringing the bell with his "hockey stick".

Panel Two

Wilberforce calls Hurricane Hattie 'Hurricane' which is kind of weird but I'm not a nickname kind of guy.  I've just been calling her Hattie.  Hattie acknowledges Wilberforce's greeting with a "Yo" which shows just how bad and tough she is.

Panel Three

Let's take a moment to ponder what the hell Hattie is wearing on her neck.  Is it one of those Lord Fauntleroy tie things?  Only in pink?  Considering Hattie is supposed to be a tough little girl, the fact that she is wearing a pink tie, light blue shirt and what I consider jeans just hurts her case.

Panel Four

Hattie's nose also protrudes from between her eyes as evidenced in the obligatory close-up panel.

Panel Five

In this panel, I have come to the conclusion that Chip does use a cut-and-paste feature and just redraws the faces.  How do I know this?  Every image of Wilberforce looks exactly the same.  

Even the little things that should not look the same panel after panel do look the same.

Also, Hattie's freckles change position from Panel Three to Four.

Panel Six

Hattie couldn't care less about actually playing hockey.  She just wants to wail on the other players and they won't let her play football.

Panel Seven

Point for Wilberforce but...

Panel Eight

...the game goes to Hattie.

But, women usually win in these situations.  Wilberforce, however, will bludgeon Hattie with his hockey stick.