Wednesday, February 05, 2025

Can't Even Let Him Compliment Her Daughter

In a dilapidated apartment building, an ugly man with a big nose that slopes into his bald head, counts numerous piles of money while he listens to the radio. Over the radio, an announcer says "...The victimized bank teller, however, described the robber as "the ugliest man I've ever seen" and added "I wish he had worn a mask!" The ugly man angrily looks at the radio. "So next time I'll send Cary Grant!"
March 10, 1966
Could a mask fit over that nose? I don't care. I hope he gets away with it. Seems like he will. "Yeah, he's ugly, but I don't think I can describe him."

Brutus, Gladys, and Mother Gargle are at the dinner table. Gladys and Mother Gargle are still sitting but Brutus has stood up. "My compliments on your homemade macaroni and cheese, Gladys. It really sticks to my ribs," Brutus says. Mother Gargle snarls "Looks like it sticks a little lower than that."
"That reminds me, speaking of sticking to ribs..." and then Brutus stabs Mother Gargle between the ribs with a knife. I'm glad they locked Wilberforce in his room for dinner tonight so he wouldn't see such violence.
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