And He Watches Them Without His Family

That'd be hard to do considering Frosty and Rudolph, the Grinch, and Charlie Brown are all on different networks. Maybe he owns the DVDs or something. Let's say, a vintage 1989 videocassette.

Swing Low Sweet Chariot

You should just quit. That's the advice I always see online when people complain about their job. Clearly those giving that advice know what they are talking about. Quit your safe and paying job and look for another one that pays more or better and go through weeks of applications and interviews before actually getting the job. And let's not forget that you normally don't get paid until after the second week so...Maybe Brutus should just keep his job.

A Couple of Flakes

Lousy reruns. It hasn't snowed anywhere yet. We're in December and snow is few to far between. What does Hattie hope to gain from this bet with Brutus? Is she just looking for clout? She knows Brutus doesn't have any money or anything good that she can take.

Give Us Some Figgy Pudding...Coffee

I've often wondered if I would like figgy pudding. I like figs, I like pudding. Is this something I would like?

I don't think it would be good as a coffee flavor but if I can get Fruity Pebbles in my coffee creamer then any flavor is possible.

No One Wants To Hear About Your Tree, Arnie

I love my house smelling like a pine forest. I'm a bit concerned that Brutus' tree makes his house smell like a plastics factory. Are some of the chemicals leaching into the air? Maybe he should move it outside or just get a new tree. I'd feel bad if this smell started killing brain cells or resulted in some sort of Christmas morning asphyxiation.

Who Watches the Watch?

Should've just said "OK" and kept your mouth closed. Now Brutus is either on the hook for hundreds of dollars or one very disappointed and possibly homicidal or suicidal young boy. And all he wanted to do was know what time it is.

I loved watches growing up. For much of my elementary school days, I would wear a watch. My favorite were the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles digital watches that had the covers on them. These things:

I don't believe I have any of these anymore, they were pretty beat up anyway. But I do still have the watch with Baloo from TaleSpin.

By the way, I finally figured out why we are in reruns and have been since October. Chip had unexpected surgery and is recuperating. Anyway, keep him in your thoughts and here's hoping for a speedy and easy recovery.

Why Did Wilberforce Put the Radio In the Oven?

The word moron was coined in 1910 by Henry Goddard. It was originally used to describe someone with an IQ of between 51 to 75 but has since fallen out of usage in the psychological community. In the 1940s and into the 1950s, "moron jokes" were the go-to joke people would go to. The were meant to be insulting and usually featured somewhat dumb people doing dumb things. Why did the moron tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? He didn't want to wake up the sleeping pills. The moron joke fell out of favor in the late 1950s and was replaced by the knock-knock joke until around the mid-1960s when the elephant joke became popular.

In 1943, Milrose Publishing in New York published two digest-sized comics on Little Moron. The comics were by Abbott "Heck" Hoecker and (Ruth) Clydene "Ilda" Oliver. The first book featured Little Moron and the second book featured Sizstor, which I'm assuming is pronounced "sister". Hoecker passed away in 2001 in Rochester, New York while Oliver passed away in 1993 in Denton, Texas.

I can't believe someone would pay 35 cents for this thing back in 1943. Look, I'm not demeaning what Heck and Ilda did here, but 35 cents? That was an entire hour of work back then.

And there's our racial slur. That's enough of these. Onto today's comics.

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Curtis

Who knew that Curtis was in the pocket of Big Post Office?

Seriously, the post office is important. Go out and buy some stamps. I do and they last forever because I mail, like, one or two things every year.

panels from Hagar the Horrible

Is this one of Hagar's worst nightmares? Him getting cucked by a court jester? I mean, it doesn't even look like anything is really happening. The jester is just hitting Helga was his...bindle?

Crock

I don't know what dress Grossie bought but if it's anything like that blue one, she just wasted her money.

She's never gonna take off that niqab and we know it.

panel from Dark Side of the Horse

Ok. Why does Horace have pictures of Krazy Kat and the cat bus from Totoro on his wall? He's a horse, why is his bedroom theme "cat"?

Arlo & Janis

Sorry, Arlo and Janis. I don't care about the Army and Navy as branches of our military. I certainly don't care about them playing football.

The Born Loser

Wilberforce should've been given something to make an outline or a graphic organizer to help organize his thoughts. The teacher should also be walking the kids through this since assigning a book report to 4th graders is something that probably doesn't happen very often.

I said that was enough!

If you would like to support my writing or research, you can buy me a cup of coffee over on Ko-fi.

(He wanted to hear hot music.)

Is the Sun Going Somewhere This Afternoon?

Yes, I can. Partly/Mostly sunny only refers to the daytime. After the sun goes down, meteorologists change to partly/mostly cloudy because there's not anything constant in the sky except the moon and that disappears at least once a month. Partly/mostly cloudy can be used during the daytime when 3-7/8ths of the sky is covered with clouds but if you want to be specifically accurate, you would use partly/mostly clear.

Anyway, Brutus will know none of this so Wilberforce will just have to stay confused.

Although, partly cloudy or partly sunny mean the same thing (3-5/8th cloud coverage) so the skies aren't actually changing so this is wrong anyway.

Who and Where Was Brutus Thornapple?

One of my favorite tropes in any media is amnesia. Whether it's Skipper getting hit by a coconut and thinking Gilligan and the other castaways are Japanese soldiers (that sounds racist) or Michelle Tanner falling off her horse and hitting her head on a rock, I love when characters get amnesia. But I was a weird kid. I don't believe most kids these days know about amnesia, especially not enough to make a pun about it.

Cookbooks for Meal Ideas? Get Out of Here!

Mother Gargle is done cooking! She's going to make her daughter do her cooking now. She never liked cooking anyway. She only did it because her damn child needed to be fed. How Gladys grew up so big and strong, we'll never know.

Very telling at how much Mother Gargle cooked considering Gladys--her daughter--had to buy her own cookbooks and apparently none were handed down by her mother.