Who Will Police the Police?

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Slylock Fox and Comics for Kids

I'm torn between what seems like the bigger crime here. On one hand, you have Big Brad Wolf who plans on assaulting people with, at most, 16 ice cubes. On the other hand, you have Slylock and Max who are basically breaking into Big Brad's house. While I believe assault is the greater crime, do we really want our law enforcement officers breaking into our houses and putting salt in our ice cubes?

Dennis the Menace

They do have an alert for that, Mr. Wilson. It's called the month of May.

Pearls Before Swine

Hello, my name is Brian and I live in one of those states. Bill Self, men's basketball coach at the University of Kansas. He even takes advantage of our moronic tax laws and deems himself an LLC where he pays virtually no taxes. Hooray!

Amazing Spider-Man

I know he's building up to something but damn it Bumbershoot Coffeesnatch, get off your ass and help Spidey already!!

The Lockhorns

1198: Did All That Paper Pile Up In Ten Minutes?

Before we get started on the return of Sunday Comic commentary, I need some help. I have finished and am currently editing a story about a transgender teen who becomes friends with and then enters a relationship with a cisgender teen. I want to make the story as true-to-life as I can and have looked up all I can on the Internet to get some of the trials a trans teen would have to go through. What I need now is someone, actually several someones, to read through it and give me notes on what's good, what needs to be changed, what doesn't work and what's just stupid.

If you would like to help out or know someone who would like help out, please send me an email at tauycreek [at] gmail.com or via the contact form and I can get the story and critique form sent to you. The story is 44 pages, contains some sexual situations, slight offensive language but I tried to write it for anyone 12 years old and up.

Now, onto the comics...

I guess it's too much to ask that this confusion last over the next week. Dan could walk in and be all "No, it's 'You fill up my bridges.'" and then Nelson could come in and be all "No, it's 'You kill all my bitches'" because Nelson clearly listens to too much rap.

I feel women should be insulted by this comic. Should women feel insulted by it?

And here I thought that B.C. was the unquestioned king of bad dictionary puns.

Marmaduke has just finished filming another scene for his balloon-popping fetish website.

On first thought, I believe those lumps protruding under the blankets are feet but considering none of these people are three feet tall, I'm going with erections.

Three minute shower. In one of my science classes, we were talking about ecology and saving water and the teacher gave a demonstration of a three minute shower to the class. Is that weird? He kept his clothes on.

Somehow, that makes it weirder...

Born Loser for 11/30/08

While I hate to admit it, this is true. Comic strip creators seem stuck in the fifties and sixties and I don't know why none of them try to shake things up. Are they scared? Do they not know how to place themselves in modern times? Do they submit edgy comics but their editors say 'No!'? I want to believe that the creator figures that since the space allowed is so small and anymore, the comics page is so trivial that they just don't bother doing anything that will make headlines.

Or they are a bunch of golf-playing morons that really are stuck in the 1950s. I don't know...


However in Chip's defense, he seems to be trying in some cases and I do like Gladys' response to Brutus in the last panel. The chef's hat is a bit much though.

The Beginning of the End

Ah, the economic crisis. I'm tired of hearing about it. This week, Cathy and her husband are in the financial planner's office planning their finances and learning that they are bankrupt. Cathy and her husband are "ACK"ing their way through the meeting, possibly causing the planner to drink more at the end of the day.

Like usual, this strip does not end humorously. I took it upon myself to fix it up and at least show what I would've written.

To make a long story short, turn off the TV, read a book. We've been through rough times before we've just never been alive for them.


Uh-oh, Dagwood's dead.

Now Blondie can cash in on that sweet, sweet life insurance.


I think we all do Rat. We all do.


So much going on. Zoe being overcome with homework, Hammie understanding the concept of an "all-nighter", Darryl running the show but I just can't get past the fact that Zoe appears to be left-handed.


Better watch out, Dolly. Daddy Keane's been on a bender and you do not want to wind up on the bad end of a Jack Daniels bottle.


Oh. I hope Born Loser doesn't spiral into the financial crisis crap that's starting to permeate the comic strips now. I don't know how long I'd be able to stand it.

"Brutus? Who's the Girl, Brutus?"

Yesterday, we had "fencing". Today we have "home economics" and "baby doll". If we continue "quoting" tomorrow, I say "we" should use "finger quotes" in every "panel."


You two do realize what other things you could hear from the women's bathroom right? Plus I've seen what happens to people who bug restrooms. I've seen those Datelines and 20/20s.


It took me awhile to notice that the strip says Van Diesel and not Vin Diesel. This strip actually brings up some interesting things. Is it intentionally Van or did Armstrong forget Vin's name. Did he change it to Van so he could make that vehicle/fuel joke or did he fear repurcustions from Mr. Diesel himself?


I don't care how long it's been, I'm always up for a Peanuts parody.

Well, it's better because not only do I get sex at home, I get it at work now. And with none of that marriage crap attached to it.

No, I don't want a ride. I don't think I could fit in your car anyway...

I always figured Brutus' mom was dead. Hopefully we don't have a Norman Bates situation here.

The Incredible Shrinking Veeblefester

[Dennis the Menace for 10/02/2008]

Dennis is really talking about her big booty. Dennis is down with the plumpers.

Mmm...Me too.

Where'd the glasses, tie and briefcase come from?

So if you have a happy marriage you're a plugger? That makes me want to run out and get married.

Veeblefester is slowly wasting away. By the end of the week, Veeblefester will just be a dot in the corner of the last panel. But at least we may not have to look at that God awful yellow vest anymore.

And does the golf ball really need the KERPLOP sound effect?

These Comics Weren't Invited To the Wedding

Having Internet problems for the last couple of days. Has been a chore to get things posted which makes it an annoyance. Hopefully next week goes smoother.


My Favorite Words

Scrotum
Pedophile (don't ask)
Debacle
Smooth
Union

My Least Favorite Words

Milky
Moist
Welding
Ghoul
Bulbous

I have an employer where that poster would look great. Too bad any form of individuality became grounds for termination.

You didn't see the huge "DO NOT USE IN WATER" warning before you bought the beached whale?

Not even his real friends on MySpace came to help him. Hopefully the few people I ask to help me move will do it. If not it's going to be one horrible weekend.

I don't mind product placement but sometimes it does get out of hand. Especially when the whole TV episode is brought to you by the new Toyota Yaris--I'm looking in your direction CW Network.

Also, this blog entry brought to you by:

Chip's Blowing My Mind

I hate these "show me" strips. They are never funny and this one made me think too much which means it's trying too hard.

Aww. I know Pig is being insulted but seeing that smile on his face warms the cockles of my heart.

Great. So when he brakes really hard, he'll flip forward and smash his face onto the floor.

Doesn't the third kid from Luann (I assume it's a girl) look like TJ? Does TJ have an illegitimate child? That would be a pretty good storyline I think plus seeing TJ as a loving, caring, inspiration parent would be fairly strange.

I mean, look at her!! She even has the perverted grin of TJ!!

Momma has some serious empty nest syndrome. Her kids need to start having some grandchildren pronto.

And a hello to my lovely fiancee who, if she was put on this Earth to make me happy, is doing a damn good job.

I see Brutus is a hunt-and-pecker at the computer. That I don't care about but I want to give a huge seal of approval to Chip for giving Brutus a flat screen monitor. So at least the Veeblefester Corporation is in the 21st Century.

Alley Oop Is Everywhere

I have a lot of comics to get through from both the papers and the web so let's get going.
This is a webcomic called Autumn Lake. I love the artwork and find it reminescent of Ernie Bushmiller, creator of Nancy.

I don't know what's funnier: the bad joke the ghost is trying to make or the woman getting upset that he's not the "future ghost" he claims to be.

So, so true. Just...so, so true.

Pig is now leaning toward becoming a cannibal. I'm all for it. I want to see Pig eat a ham sandwich or something. I wonder if Rat has ever given him one. Rat would do that, you know.

And here we are. Alley Oop is now 75. Time to die now.

Oop makes a special guest appearance in today's B.C.. So now I really am confused by the strip's placement in history.

Oop is also mentioned in today's Born Loser. I can see how Wilberforce could be confused because Oop is a caveman from the prehistoric ages and he's just now turning 75? I'm with Wilberforce: "Whaaaaaaaat?"